Amusing Railway Tales

[Whistler40145]

I thought during this dramatic time of the Coronavirus lockdown we need something upbeat and jolly.

Share any amusing tales you have from travelling on our wonderful railway system

 

[Jamesrob637]

I caught a Northern Fail train in the peak which had six carriages and ran roughly on time

 

[Whistler40145]

Was on a Pathfinder Tours branch line Tour years ago and left Peter Watts behind on Doncaster Railway Station whilst the tour did the flyover onto the Lincoln Line, he did get on on the return journey

 

[High Dyke]

I've had a few over the years, but one of the most notable was whilst travelling on the Whistler Finale rail tour in 1985. The train overshot its booked stop at Grantham on the return leg. However, the communication got pulled and the train then reversed about a mile into Grantham station for passengers to alight. I had a mates 18th birthday party to attend that evening, and I wasn't going to miss that! To add to the fun another of my mates was waiting at Grantham to get a couple of photos, but stormed off in a huff when it didn't stop.

Only now have I found this entry on the Six Bells Junction website.

(2) Train missed booked stop at station and had to reverse. Nigel Cockburn confirms: I was In a compartment with a lad who boarded at Grantham and was due to leave the train at Grantham. His face was a picture as we sped through at around 90mph and much to the amazement of the photographers on the platform with their tripods at the ready. The lad pulled the emergency cord in our compartment which caused the train to stop as you say round a mile further on. The guard came to our compartment to enquire why the cord had been pulled.

 

[Whistler40145]

I was on A1A Charters Cold Turkey Railtour and we were returning from Wrexham and were booked to stop at Warrington Bank Quay on the return to Preston and we bombed straight through on the Fast Line and had to make an unadvertised stop at Earlestown, we later found out that the Driver wasn’t aware of the stop at Warrington.....Oops

 

[Vespa]

Similar thing in the 90s travelling from Liverpool on a pacer, the train driver went past Whiston station and stopped, he reversed the train back to Whiston station, must be a quarter of a mile.

I don't what the ramifications were assuming it showed up on the signals circuit or if he got away with it.

 

[lxfe_mxtterz]

Many years back, I had the misfortune of catching a (filthy) First Capital Connect Class 319 from Brighton one evening. But what made this particular trip memorable was the fact that, on the window next to the bay of seats I chose to sit in, there was a slimy slice of gherkin splattered on the window, which I only happened to notice after I had sat down. Strange and small, but it was somewhat amusing and has kept the memory of the journey fresh in my mind for all this time.

Another interesting First Capital Connect anecdote of mine - which probably applies to most night journeys on older trains - is travelling on a Class 319 in the pitch black of night with no onboard announcements whatsoever, which made it incredibly hard to determine which stations we had stopped at. Every time we stopped, in order to ensure I was getting off at the right place, I was forced to peer out the window into the abyss of tenebrosity to look for a station sign, which half of the time wasn't even visible from my seat! Nevertheless, I did thankfully manage to disembark at the correct station.

 

[Whistler40145]

In the early 1990s I was returning from Weymouth to Bristol Temple Meads behind a Class 37+LCHS and went bombing through Keynsham and the driver stopped at the next signal, get out and telephoned the Bobby, gained permission to reverse back, but on doing so, the 37 decided to shut down and it took absolutely ages to restart the loco

 

[rg177]

I recall sitting near the cab on a 465 one afternoon and we didn't depart as expected.

Cue overhearing driver onto control with "I've snapped the power handle". How that happened I don't know but thankfully as this was a bay platform at Orpington everything else didn't proceed to fall apart around us.

 

[Whistler40145]

I recall sitting near the cab on a 465 one afternoon and we didn't depart as expected.

Cue overhearing driver onto control with "I've snapped the power handle". How that happened I don't know but thankfully as this was a bay platform at Orpington everything else didn't proceed to fall apart around us.

Oops

I wonder how the conversation went after that

 

[Ostrich]

I remember a Saturday Network South East Day, presumably back in the 1980's, when the early morning services on the West of England line were enhanced by a special which was supposed to be most stations to Waterloo and was scheduled to call at Crewkerne at 06:30. About 50 folk were on the platform waiting in anticipation as the Stationmaster announced the imminent arrival over the tannoy. And a Class 50 and rake duly rounded the curve and bombed straight through the station at line speed ....

As we watched the tail lamp disappearing rapidly down the straight towards Yeovil, the Stationmaster emerged onto the platform and announced, completely deadpan, "That WAS the 06:30 to Waterloo. The next scheduled service is at 06:50 ….."

Some mix-up with the train crew orders at Laira, it was subsequently rumoured.

 

[Whistler40145]

I remember a Saturday Network South East Day, presumably back in the 1980's, when the early morning services on the West of England line were enhanced by a special which was supposed to be most stations to Waterloo and was scheduled to call at Crewkerne at 06:30. About 50 folk were on the platform waiting in anticipation as the Stationmaster announced the imminent arrival over the tannoy. And a Class 50 and rake duly rounded the curve and bombed straight through the station at line speed ....

As we watched the tail lamp disappearing rapidly down the straight towards Yeovil, the Stationmaster emerged onto the platform and announced, completely deadpan, "That WAS the 06:30 to Waterloo. The next scheduled service is at 06:50 ….."

Some mix-up with the train crew orders at Laira, it was subsequently rumoured.

Ooh no, that was a big shame

 

[pdeaves]

Early 1990s, Bristol Temple Meads. I was on a 158 travelling to Bath. At the allotted time 'beep, beep, beep', the doors closed. 'Buzz, buzz' from the guard. Nothing happened. 'Buzz, buzz' again. Nothing happened. 'Buzzzzzzz, buzzzzzzz'. Still nothing happened. The guard walked down the platform and looked into the driver's cab to find it empty. Not long after there was a station PA announcement 'would the driver of 1F19 (or whatever) please proceed to platform 10 at once; your train is ready to depart'!

 

[Whistler40145]

Early 1990s, Bristol Temple Meads. I was on a 158 travelling to Bath. At the allotted time 'beep, beep, beep', the doors closed. 'Buzz, buzz' from the guard. Nothing happened. 'Buzz, buzz' again. Nothing happened. 'Buzzzzzzz, buzzzzzzz'. Still nothing happened. The guard walked down the platform and looked into the driver's cab to find it empty. Not long after there was a station PA announcement 'would the driver of 1F19 (or whatever) please proceed to platform 10 at once; your train is ready to depart'!

No doubt a rather red faced driver once he’d been located

 

[davetheguard]

For a while in probably the late 70's & early 80's, B.R. ran a series of Merrymaker excursions from our local stations. Most had specific destinations, but a handful were described as "Mystery Excursions" - Mystex in B.R. parlance.

Cue the scene one morning, the platform full of people waiting for their train to know-not-where, looking forward to guessing where they might be going as the journey progressed. Station announcement: the train now arriving at platform one is the mystery excursion to Weston super Mare. Talk about open mouth before engaging brain!

 

[pdeaves]

For a while in probably the late 70's & early 80's, B.R. ran a series of Merrymaker excursions from our local stations. Most had specific destinations, but a handful were described as "Mystery Excursions" - Mystex in B.R. parlance.

Cue the scene one morning, the platform full of people waiting for their train to know-not-where, looking forward to guessing where they might be going as the journey progressed. Station announcement: the train now arriving at platform one is the mystery excursion to Weston super Mare. Talk about open mouth before engaging brain!

Nice! Thinking of mysteries, there is a well-known take of a couple on holiday (in Llandudno?) who took a trip on a MYSTEX... that took them to their home town (Margate?). I can't remember the places but remember reading of them deciding to pop home for a cup of tea before going back to their holiday.

 

[Peter Mugridge]

Nice! Thinking of mysteries, there is a well-known take of a couple on holiday (in Llandudno?) who took a trip on a MYSTEX... that took them to their home town (Margate?). I can't remember the places but remember reading of them deciding to pop home for a cup of tea before going back to their holiday.

I've heard that one. Yes, it was home to Margate where the tour took them. Not 100% sure where they were on holiday though.

 

[David M]

Late 1970s or very early 1980s and the last train on a midweek night from Glasgow Queen Street to Cumbernauld.
At that time, there was a change required at Springburn from electric to diesel and so across the platform we all went.
A class 101 dmu with 1st class section front and rear - very comfortable, almost armchairs. As this was a Glasgow suburban line, all seats were classed as 2nd (now standard). The partition between the drivers cab and the 1st class bit had the curtains/blinds open so the drivers cab was fully visible.
On came the driver and...nothing.
5 minutes later, still nothing - why's the train not going we thought.
Then 2 (I assume BTP) policemen and some BR manager types arrived, opened the cab door and arrested the driver for being drunk.
New driver got on board, toot toot and off we went.
In retrospect maybe not amusing!

 

[Whistler40145]

Late 1970s or very early 1980s and the last train on a midweek night from Glasgow Queen Street to Cumbernauld.
At that time, there was a change required at Springburn from electric to diesel and so across the platform we all went.
A class 101 dmu with 1st class section front and rear - very comfortable, almost armchairs. As this was a Glasgow suburban line, all seats were classed as 2nd (now standard). The partition between the drivers cab and the 1st class bit had the curtains/blinds open so the drivers cab was fully visible.
On came the driver and...nothing.
5 minutes later, still nothing - why's the train not going we thought.
Then 2 (I assume BTP) policemen and some BR manager types arrived, opened the cab door and arrested the driver for being drunk.
New driver got on board, toot toot and off we went.
In retrospect maybe not amusing!

No doubt said inebriated driver would’ve been fired for has actions

 

[ChiefPlanner]

Another Glasgow tale , which could be possible.

5 car "heritage" set into Queen St ex depot , splits - first 3 set off to wherever , rear 2 form a local departure.Train loads up , signal cleared etc.....whereupon the fresh driver discovers he has 2 unpowered trailer cars to form the train. IN those days there engines around , so the passengers got home with something like a 26 on the front. Albeit late.

 

[pdeaves]

Approximately 1992, St Pancras station. A class 47-hauled set being prepared for departure, first stop Wellingborough. Doors slammed, whistles blown, etc., stragglers leap on at the nearest door. The train set off and a gentleman, having now managed to catch his breath asked 'is this the Welwyn(-Garden-City) train?'. Wrong terminus. I don't remember how that was sorted out; I don't recall a special stop anywhere but there may have been.

 

[NorthWestRover]

I've thought of one. I'm sure there are all sorts of embarrassing stories from spotting and then bashing in my teenage years, but I seem to have blocked those out. When I get my notebooks, the memories might come flooding back.

Anyway, in summer 1986, I'd just finished my second year at Wolverhampton Polytechnic. I had a couple of friends in Hereford, so I thought I'd take a trip down there. I've no idea what the traction was - it would have been 86 or 87 from Warrington to Crewe and I seem to remember a 47 back from Hereford. Were the Cromptons still working them then? Well, after we'd had a couple of days enjoying Hereford and the surrounding area, I bade farewell to my friends and made my way to a small pub by the very old bridge in the city. It was a pub famed for its cider straight from the barrel. Five pints later, I staggered to the station and promptly fell asleep on one of those old parcels trolleys that used to be around platforms. Five hours later, I awoke to catch one of the last trains back to Crewe. Thank heavens you could basically use your ticket on any train back then. I'll update this with date and traction details post lockdown.

 

[70014IronDuke]

Approximately 1992, St Pancras station. A class 47-hauled set being prepared for departure, first stop Wellingborough. Doors slammed, whistles blown, etc., stragglers leap on at the nearest door. The train set off and a gentleman, having now managed to catch his breath asked 'is this the Welwyn(-Garden-City) train?'. Wrong terminus. I don't remember how that was sorted out; I don't recall a special stop anywhere but there may have been.

If you have got the year correctly, then I think it must have been the 17.30 (?) ex Pancras, because by then there was only one LHCS commuter relief. It was first stop Bedford, I think.

 

[edwin_m]

Another Glasgow tale , which could be possible.

5 car "heritage" set into Queen St ex depot , splits - first 3 set off to wherever , rear 2 form a local departure.Train loads up , signal cleared etc.....whereupon the fresh driver discovers he has 2 unpowered trailer cars to form the train. IN those days there engines around , so the passengers got home with something like a 26 on the front. Albeit late.

I heard the same story with some of Tyseley's plethora of units, splitting at (I think) Derby.

 

[70014IronDuke]

Nice! Thinking of mysteries, there is a well-known take of a couple on holiday (in Llandudno?) who took a trip on a MYSTEX... that took them to their home town (Margate?). I can't remember the places but remember reading of them deciding to pop home for a cup of tea before going back to their holiday.

I remember this story, and I too thought one of the places was on the N Wales coast, but I couldn't remember where. Really funny though

 

[CC 72100]

Perhaps one of those 'you had to be there moments' but I can't think back to a story of misfortune I've experienced without a daft grin appearing.

Summer of 2018, and myself, brother and dad are on a busy Eurocity train from Berlin to Prague. Proper full and standing affair, thankfully we had reserved seats in a compartment shared with an Austrian couple and someone else who must clearly be pretty non-descript as I remember nothing about them.

About 45 minutes into the journey after fighting my way to the loo and back, I take a bottle of water out from the rucksack that is on the rack above our seats. One of these bottles with what the marketing probably calls a 'sports cap' or something similar. I replace the bottle back in the bag.

Shortly after Dresden, an irregular but not unnoticeable drip starts above my dad. This goes on for a few minutes. I receive a glare and questioning as to whether I put the bottle cap on properly. I protest my innocence. Dad decides to check.

At this point, we discover that the rucksack is probably now home to half a bottle of water. We take out our documents and dad fights his way down the aisle with said rucksack, leaking water as he goes down the narrow aisle all over the other passengers (who have been glaring at us for most of the journey, envious of our seated luxury in MAV-STARTs finest compartment coach with temperamental air con), to empty it. Alas the toilet is occupied, and so the rucksack is turned inside out in the corridor connection between the two coaches.

For the next two hours we all sit there with various bits of paperwork, tickets and maps on our legs trying to dry them out. The Austrians try desperately to keep a straight face at the situation and only engage in what I can best describe as 'warm eye contact', meaning roughly "we're not quite sure what to say, this whole thing is rather amusing but we are too polite to laugh".

 

[Meerkat]

On Interrail we were in a couchette on a pretty empty overnight train from Italy to Vienna.
I woke up, and needing a stretch I opened the door and stood up in the corridor, clad only in my boxer shorts.
It was at this point I found out that it became a commuter train as it neared Vienna, as evidenced by a corridor of briefcase carrying, suited Austrians staring quizzically at me.
I maintained my Englishness by politely saying good morning before returning inside.

 

[rg177]

On Interrail we were in a couchette on a pretty empty overnight train from Italy to Vienna.
I woke up, and needing a stretch I opened the door and stood up in the corridor, clad only in my boxer shorts.
It was at this point I found out that it became a commuter train as it neared Vienna, as evidenced by a corridor of briefcase carrying, suited Austrians staring quizzically at me.
I maintained my Englishness by politely saying good morning before returning inside.

This reminds me of when I was on an SJ sleeper train from Stockholm to Malmö and had just indulged in a shower.

I was sat on the bed with a towel around my head, just in boxers again, when as we approached Vasterås, an Intercity train pulled up alongside and maintained our speed, running parallel.

I was in darkness so the passengers were fairly oblivious on the other train, but it was an odd experience!

 

[Meerkat]

When we were in Sweden we watched a film in the cinema coach!

 

[Sad Sprinter]

Interrailing from Italy to Austria overnight with a friend, had a nightmare and woke up most of the carriage it seemed-judging by the angry knocks I got from the wall from the neighbouring compartment!