Emergency last thing in the cupboard meal, and other culinary adventures under confinement

[SHD]

(A perfect pot-pourri of in-jest and serious ingredients!)

As Paris is about to fall under heavy confinement, let me share with you a few cooking tips for these strange times:

• It's all good and well to buy humongous quantities of pasta, but please cook them correctly! Plenty of water (at least 1 L for 100 g of pasta, more for spaghetti or linguine which require more space), and salt your water!
• Barley is a delicious alternative to rice or pasta. Gently brown a minced onion in olive oil, add ~200g of barley (rinsed beforehand), pour ~1L of vegetable/chicken stock (of course the cubed version is acceptable), add diced carrots and zucchini, let simmer, season to your taste. And for those who watch food miles: barley is as local as can be!
• Chickpeas and fava beans will outlast everything else on Earth. They will still be there, ready to soak and cook, when your cupboard is eaten to dirt by termites. And they're dirt cheap, too

Feel free to add other ideas!

 

[scotrail158713]

It's all good and well to buy humongous quantities of pasta, but please cook them correctly! Plenty of water (at least 1 L for 100 g of pasta, more for spaghetti or linguine which require more space), and salt your water!

All this chat about salt in water for boiling pasta has made me reconsider how I do it. I think I’ll have some tomorrow night so will report back on any difference I notice by adding salt.

 

[alexf380]

When poaching eggs (assuming you are lucky enough to posess some) swirl the water to create a whirlpool, and gently release the egg into the water. Add a splash of white vinegar if you wish. Not sure what it does but the Mrs hasn't complained yet!

 

[rg177]

My girlfriend has taken me in for a wee while (uni being closed, and my dad is having cancer treatment so I don't want to be getting him sick) and made a rather pleasing risotto this evening from whatever was in the cupboards.

It was basically some risotto rice, two veggie stock cubes, leaving the two to simmer for a while, lashings of white wine, peas, and a can of mushroom soup. It surprised the both of us with how tasty it was.

 

[SHD]

When poaching eggs (assuming you are lucky enough to posess some) swirl the water to create a whirlpool, and gently release the egg into the water. Add a splash of white vinegar if you wish. Not sure what it does but the Mrs hasn't complained yet!

Thank you!
I’ve never been able to get anything else than an ugly-looking bunch of whitish egg filaments by poaching in a pan. The microwave fallback method was unsatisfactory too. I’ll have to try yours!

I have 19 eggs left as of tonight... and in true French bureaucratic style, we will now need to fill in a self certification form when going out for shopping, to be shown to the powers that be on the street.
“Officer, I DO need poached eggs in red wine sauce tonight. Honest, ´ficcer”

 

[CaptainHaddock]

Marmite spaghetti.

www.nigella.com/recipes/spaghetti-with-marmite

You may scoff at Nigella passing it off as a recipe but it's really tasty and about a simple a meal as you can get!

 

[Cowley]

I’m a fan of just roasting any bits of veg that are left in the fridge or cupboards, along with some stuffing (which I always seem to have in the cupboard for some reason. I don’t think either of us ever remember buying any, yet it’s always in there and it’s always sage and onion. It’s like it regenerates somehow). It’s such an easy meal, and really cheap too.
I don’t need meat with it. Just whatever sauces/chutneys are kicking about (or maybe even Marmite..?), and the kids all love it too.

 

[kermit]

...so....all the predictions suggest that coronavirus will put a brake on society (with many personal tragedies along the way), rather than a complete collapse of the way of life we take for granted. But if it all goes worst case plus plus plus, what would be the final thing at the back of your cupboard that out of starvation and desperation you ate last of all?
Mine would be the packet of wholewheat spaghetti, second hand, as the original owner was (rightly) so disgusted by the flavour and texture that they "accidentally" left it at my house. I have no idea why I put it in the cupboard rather than the bin, but now it could be the last food standing. It's like eating cardboard. To be served, perhaps, with the out of date tin of pilchards that lurks beside it at the back. Any worse nom (not nom-nom) inations?

 

[Cowley]

...so....all the predictions suggest that coronavirus will put a brake on society (with many personal tragedies along the way), rather than a complete collapse of the way of life we take for granted. But if it all goes worst case plus plus plus, what would be the final thing at the back of your cupboard that out of starvation and desperation you ate last of all?
Mine would be the packet of wholewheat spaghetti, second hand, as the original owner was (rightly) so disgusted by the flavour and texture that they "accidentally" left it at my house. I have no idea why I put it in the cupboard rather than the bin, but now it could be the last food standing. It's like eating cardboard. To be served, perhaps, with the out of date tin of pilchards that lurks beside it at the back. Any worse nom (not nom-nom) inations?

The dog, and then the children.

 

[Cowley]

I’m joking. I don’t keep them in the cupboard...

 

[alexf380]

There's a carton of UHT milk in the back of my cupboard that was "gifted" to me by my Granny when I left home a year and a half ago. Probably that, or the tin of spam that came with it.

(Obviously I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm never going to use those two particular items)

 

[Cowley]

There's a carton of UHT milk in the back of my cupboard that was "gifted" to me by my Granny when I left home a year and a half ago. Probably that, or the tin of spam that came with it.

(Obviously I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm never going to use those two particular items)

I assume that you’ve never tried ‘Devonian Spam, blanched in river water and served with a UHT jus’?
I’d tell you the recipe but it was passed down to me by my grandmother (who died of food poisoning).

 

[SHD]

...so....all the predictions suggest that coronavirus will put a brake on society (with many personal tragedies along the way), rather than a complete collapse of the way of life we take for granted. But if it all goes worst case plus plus plus, what would be the final thing at the back of your cupboard that out of starvation and desperation you ate last of all?
Mine would be the packet of wholewheat spaghetti, second hand, as the original owner was (rightly) so disgusted by the flavour and texture that they "accidentally" left it at my house. I have no idea why I put it in the cupboard rather than the bin, but now it could be the last food standing. It's like eating cardboard. To be served, perhaps, with the out of date tin of pilchards that lurks beside it at the back. Any worse nom (not nom-nom) inations?

Not in the cupboard, but that would be frozen mochis bought to please my daughter who was very excited about them after discovering their existence watching a cartoon. I could not for the life of me figure out what that stuff is made of. However there are still 8 of them in the freezer.

There's a carton of UHT milk in the back of my cupboard that was "gifted" to me by my Granny when I left home a year and a half ago. Probably that, or the tin of spam that came with it.

(Obviously I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm never going to use those two particular items)

I assume that you’ve never tried ‘Devonian Spam, blanched in river water and served with a UHT jus’?
I’d tell you the recipe but it was passed down to me by my grandmother (who died of food poisoning).

Ooooh I love that idea of UHT jus. I can SEE the carton having almost doubled in volume, ready to burst and flood your cupboard with a lava-like sour viciousness.

Marmite spaghetti.

www.nigella.com/recipes/spaghetti-with-marmite

You may scoff at Nigella passing it off as a recipe but it's really tasty and about a simple a meal as you can get!

Well Marmite is akin to super ultra mega condensed stock, right? So yes, with the right quantities, that should be tasty and filling!

 

[GusB]

I have a couple of tins of sweetcorn whose best before date was some time in 2014. I know they'll be fine to eat but I detest sweetcorn as a standalone veg. I can just about cope with it as an ingredient in other dishes, but it's not something I'd use voluntarily.

Oh, there are two tins of kidney beans from 2016. Maybe some kind of chilli is in order...

 

[Islineclear3_1]

Tin of broad beans dating from 2018...

 

[Puffing Devil]

Thank you!
I’ve never been able to get anything else than an ugly-looking bunch of whitish egg filaments by poaching in a pan. The microwave fallback method was unsatisfactory too. I’ll have to try yours!

I have 19 eggs left as of tonight... and in true French bureaucratic style, we will now need to fill in a self certification form when going out for shopping, to be shown to the powers that be on the street.
“Officer, I DO need poached eggs in red wine sauce tonight. Honest, ´ficcer”

Your water should not be on a rolling boil when poaching eggs. Bring it to the boil, then roll the heat right back, so there's just the hint of the occasional bubble. Vigorous boiling causes the eggs to separate - though fresh eggs stay together a lot better than older ones.

Boiled eggs will keep well in the fridge for a week, shelled or unshelled.

Check your eggs by placing them (whole) into a pint glass of water, or a bowl. If they stay on the bottom they're super fresh. The further they start to stand up, the less fresh they are. Discard any floaters!

 

[baz962]

When poaching eggs (assuming you are lucky enough to posess some) swirl the water to create a whirlpool, and gently release the egg into the water. Add a splash of white vinegar if you wish. Not sure what it does but the Mrs hasn't complained yet!

The vinegar is supposed to stop the egg whites spreading I believe .

 

[nlogax]

When poaching eggs (assuming you are lucky enough to posess some) swirl the water to create a whirlpool, and gently release the egg into the water. Add a splash of white vinegar if you wish. Not sure what it does but the Mrs hasn't complained yet!

Fresh eggs is the key. You shouldn't need a whirlpool or vinegar with those - fresh eggs gather a lot more willingly than the three week old things we normally have lying around our kitchens I freely admit, getting hold of fresh eggs in the current climate can be a challenge..

 

[alexf380]

The vinegar is supposed to stop the egg whites spreading I believe .

Ahhh thank you, I thought it was something like that.

 

[nidave]

All of these can be made in batches and frozen especially for quick lunches

Chicken Broth / Soup
I bought a cooked chicken
Stripped it of meat, boiled the bones in water for a few hours
Removed Bones
Added what veg I had in the freezer
Few stock pots
Garlic
Added Chicken bits
Portioned into freezer bags and frozen - amazingly tasty

Sausage Stuffing / Meatloaf
Breadcrumbs
Sausage meat
Garlic
Herbs
Mix loosely
Cook

Corned Beef Hotpot / Stew
Spuds
Chop an Onion
Carrots
Cover the potatoes with water
2 oxo cubes Beef
salt and pepper
10 min before cooked crumble tin of corned beef
thicken the sauce

Serve with red cabbage or beetroot

 

[DelW]

Last week a friend, who has finally sold a flat he moved out of last year, asked me to help clear the kitchen cupboards there and take anything I wanted. Most of it was too old even for me, but there were unopened packets of pasta and rice. Since I'd been caught with no rice and not much pasta in stock, I did keep them despite some pretty historic use-by dates. They haven't gone mouldy, and they'll be cooked in boiling water, so I don't think they can do me too much harm!
At the start of the current concern, when tinned foods were still fairly plentiful, I checked my emergency reserve of tins, and decided to replace some of them. The ones I used dated back to 2011 at the earliest, and the contents were fine

 

[61653 HTAFC]

Just looked at the back of my cupboard, there's a tin of pineapple rings with a best before date of September 2017... if it comes to it, I'd better deep-fry them in batter!

 

[Bletchleyite]

A good one is pasta with tuna, sweetcorn and mayonnaise[1], all mixed up. All from the cupboard.

[1] I particularly like doing it with Nando's Perinaise but any sort of mayo will do.

 

[D365]

I particularly like doing it with Nando's Perinaise but any sort of mayo will do.

A good shout! I normally slather it on top of pizza but goes well with tuna pasta too

 

[SHD]

A good one is pasta with tuna, sweetcorn and mayonnaise[1], all mixed up. All from the cupboard.

[1] I particularly like doing it with Nando's Perinaise but any sort of mayo will do.

Oh yes!
I add diced tomatoes, pine nuts and freshly chopped parsley and coriander. (All of which are still available in lockdowned Paris, while eggs are in very short supply!)
This "pasta salad" can be enjoyed warm or cold.

I prefer to make my own mayonnaise, but I have no "perfect tip" to share. Most of the times it works perfectly -- and at times, for no discernable reason at all, it fails miserably.

 

[trainophile]

Just looked at the back of my cupboard, there's a tin of pineapple rings with a best before date of September 2017... if it comes to it, I'd better deep-fry them in batter!

I think I have one of those too, from a brief flirtation with gammon steaks. Better be a bit careful with things that are in an acidic juice like tinned fruit, as it can take the coating off the inside of the tin.

 

[scotrail158713]

Well with the Church of Scotland cancelling all services for the foreseeable future all the biscuits at my church had to go somewhere - they couldn’t possibly be thrown out

 

[alxndr]

I've a little packet of wheat berries that I don't know where they came from or what to do with (possibly bulk out a stew?) that will probably be the last to go.

Or I have two nearly whole bags of that meal replacement powder stuff from when I was having surgery and not sure if I'd be able to cook for myself. Bit like drinking dust, but it's apparently enough for a person to survive on.

 

[DarloRich]

Get yourselves a slow cooker. Ideal for large, stodgy, filling meals that you can batch and freeze. It is also ideal for using up odds and sods.

 

[mmh]

A good one is pasta with tuna, sweetcorn and mayonnaise[1], all mixed up. All from the cupboard.

[1] I particularly like doing it with Nando's Perinaise but any sort of mayo will do.

The problem with that one is tuna is no longer cheap.