Random thoughts

[Cowley]

I'll be surprised if they are allowed to work past midnight.

It's happened before overnight about three years ago, it was the drains under the pavements that time.
The trouble is that the road is very busy during rush hour so it's the only time they dare shut it. They worked all night last night further up the road, all the trucks were parked next to us (luckily with their engines switched off) until 3am when they moved up the road. I'd had a couple of beers though so I didn't hear a thing. No beer tonight though, I must be good, plus we seem to be somewhat trapped at the moment...

This was last nights scene at ten pm.

 

[DaleCooper]

Tonight the road right outside is being resurfaced. Apparently it's going to be finished by morning rush hour. It's going to be a long night.

I wish someone would resurface reality.

 

[GusB]

I wish someone would resurface reality.

What is reality?

 

[Cowley]

I wish someone would resurface reality.

That's deeper than tarmac.

 

[DaleCooper]

What is reality?

My point exactly.

That's deeper than tarmac.

It's also:

Younger than springtime
Softer than starlight
Gayer than laughter
Sweeter than music

 

[Cowley]

I was disappointed to see that they hadn't finished the road this morning (they were still at it at 5am according to the kids), they're doing the top layer tonight. We're going for a walk to the pub now which seems like a good idea.

 

[DaleCooper]

I was disappointed to see that they hadn't finished the road this morning (they were still at it at 5am according to the kids), they're doing the top layer tonight. We're going for a walk to the pub now which seems like a good idea.

Don't forget to leave a trail of breadcrumbs so you can find your way home.

 

[najaB]

Don't forget to leave a trail of breadcrumbs so you can find your way home.

If he leaves them in the road and they get asphalted over, will they grow to to be traffic calming speed cushions*?

* The road feature formerly known as sleeping policemen.

 

[DaleCooper]

If he leaves them in the road and they get asphalted over, will they grow to to be traffic calming speed cushions*?

* The road feature formerly known as sleeping policemen.

I perhaps wrongly assumed they would go via the enchanted forest.

 

[Cowley]

I just had to pick the dog up and carry him over the road lest he became stuck to the new surface.
They've got road rollers. I'd like a road roller.

 

[Cowley]

This leaf fell on the shiny new tarmac and the road roller just missed it.
I felt pleased for the leaf...

 

[tsr]

I just had to pick the dog up and carry him over the road lest he became stuck to the new surface.
They've got road rollers. I'd like a road roller.

You wouldn't like one if your dog was stuck to the road and you'd forgotten whether you left the handbrake on...

(Assuming the gradient of the road makes this plausible, and that rollers are braked with handbrakes.)

(Do road rollers have handbrakes?)

 

[Cowley]

You wouldn't like one if your dog was stuck to the road and you'd forgotten whether you left the handbrake on...

(Assuming the gradient of the road makes this plausible, and that rollers are braked with handbrakes.)

(Do road rollers have handbrakes?)

Hm. I think they must have handbrakes or there'd be loads of flattened cartoon characters everywhere.

 

[GusB]

"Why do birds suddenly appear?"

Seagulls normally give warnings when they're about to swoop on you. There was no warning tonight. All I heard was a sudden "whoosh" and this winged creature did a fly-past mere inches above my head. Are there no rules of engagement any more?

 

[TheEdge]

You need to fire a warning shot unless fired upon. Damn Gull Rights Lawyers.

 

[DaleCooper]

"Why do birds suddenly appear?"

Seagulls normally give warnings when they're about to swoop on you. There was no warning tonight. All I heard was a sudden "whoosh" and this winged creature did a fly-past mere inches above my head. Are there no rules of engagement any more?

Two possibilities:

1. It didn't know you were there. Were you in stealth mode at the time?

2. Was it wearing dark glasses and carrying a white stick?

 

[Domh245]

"Why do birds suddenly appear?"

Seagulls normally give warnings when they're about to swoop on you. There was no warning tonight. All I heard was a sudden "whoosh" and this winged creature did a fly-past mere inches above my head. Are there no rules of engagement any more?

The seagulls that stole my Dad's lunch today also gave no warning. It was there one moment and by the time he'd walked inside to fetch his cup of tea, the plate had been ransacked by 3 or 4 gulls!

 

[GusB]

Two possibilities:

1. It didn't know you were there. Were you in stealth mode at the time?

2. Was it wearing dark glasses and carrying a white stick?

I certainly wasn't in stealth mode when I tripped on the steps on the way into the house!

The seagulls that stole my Dad's lunch today also gave no warning. It was there one moment and by the time he'd walked inside to fetch his cup of tea, the plate had been ransacked by 3 or 4 gulls!

I wouldn't give a warning if I was going to steal someone's lunch, either

 

[krus_aragon]

The seagulls that stole my Dad's lunch today also gave no warning. It was there one moment and by the time he'd walked inside to fetch his cup of tea, the plate had been ransacked by 3 or 4 gulls!

They might give no explicit "warning", but from frequent visits to Conwy, Llandudno, etc I can readily identify when a seagull is "eyeing-up" a tourist's food. They tend to perch somewhere and stare for a while, judging "is there food", "can I get it", and "when should I make my move".

Seagulls know they're more likely to get your food off you if they attack you from over your shoulder, so again you think they've come at you without warning. Just getting you to drop your ice cream or chips is enough: most people abandon their food if it lands on the floor, and then the seagull just needs to eat it before any other gulls arrive.

Number one tip when eating chips at the seaside: sit with your back to a wall/tree, so you can't be attacked from behind.


(Eurgh, this is far too sensible a post for this thread. But it's typed now...)

 

[PeterY]

I'm sure seagulls talk to each other. "Chips lads at 11 o Clock" before attacking.

Trying to eat a Cornish pasty in St Ives was hard work. I was being watched.

 

[DaleCooper]

(Eurgh, this is far too sensible a post for this thread. But it's typed now...)

As punishment you must come up with six appropriate seabird puns or double entendres.

 

[Cowley]

As punishment you must come up with six appropriate seabird puns or double entendres.

I think what we look to you for Dale.

 

[GusB]

As punishment you must come up with six appropriate seabird puns or double entendres.

I've probably gone for the most obvious, but I don't see many shags around here.

 

[Cowley]

I've probably gone for the most obvious, but I don't see many shags around here.

Oh no, this is about to take a Tern for the worse.

 

[Domh245]

Oh no, this is about to take a Tern for the worse.

No Sea bird based pun/double entendre chain is complete without reference to Boobies

edit to add: link is safe for work

 

[Cowley]

No Sea bird based pun/double entendre chain is complete without reference to Boobies

edit to add: link is safe for work

I might wait until I'm in private just in case.

It's all tits with you lot isn't it.

 

[DaleCooper]

I think what we look to you for Dale.

I can't think of any at the moment, I'm too busy watching "The Importance of Being Erne Nest".

 

[TheEdge]

I can't think of any at the moment, I'm too busy watching "The Importance of Being Erne Nest".

Even by your standards thats painful.

 

[Peter Mugridge]

Oh, do stop crowing you lot...

 

[GusB]

I know what I'm going to have for Sunday dinner now - haven't had roast chicken in a while. Thanks for the inspiration!