Some sanctimonious and judgemental individuals are shaming law abiding citizens

[yorkie]

'Shamed' despite sticking to social distancing rules

Even those abiding by the lockdown regulations can find themselves the target for shaming.

www.bbc.co.uk

Those who ignore the regulations have faced condemnation or even police action, but even those who have been abiding by the rules can find themselves experiencing social distancing shaming.

Lauren Ford said people were jumping to the wrong conclusions when judging other people.

She said she saw two young men receiving a "barrel load of abuse" from an older man when they ran past him on Cramond Beach.

"They calmly explained that they were flatmates and had been together for the past three weeks and hadn't seen anyone else, but the man still carried on shouting.

"He didn't apologise and carried on saying they were still in the wrong. It wasn't fair at all.

"People are judging so fast, its unreal."

Coronavirus: Neighbour reports ‘selfish’ commuting NHS worker for 'non-essential car trips'

Sam Halms, who works at the Norfolk & Suffolk Mental Health Foundation Trust, defended herself after a neighbour mistakenly named her ‘part of the problem’.

uk.news.yahoo.com

An NHS worker was left shocked after a neighbour left a “nasty” note on her car calling her “selfish” for driving to work every day - unaware she is a frontline keyworker.

The person claimed to have “reported” Halms after seeing her leave the house while not in uniform - and accused the health worker of “clearly unessential travel”.

The note read: “To the selfish person, I have been watching you travel every day in your car. You are not in uniform, so this is clearly unessential travel! You are part of the problem!

While there are a tiny minority of people who are breaking the rules, there is also another minority of extremely vocal people who appear to be in a competition to be as sanctimonious and accusatory as they possibly can be. They can be judgemental; they can use hyperbole, they can be rude and they tend to be unaware of what the legislation actually says (while thinking they are experts).

So far I've not encountered anyone like this personally (so far) but if I do, I will be up for an argument with them.

 

[farleigh]

Some people love to feel that they can judge other people and - more sadly - shame them on social media. It is an unpleasant trait. We are supposed to be in this together, supporting others where necessary. Thankfully most people are respecting the rules and in many cases giving up their time to make this a bit more bearable for those who are struggling.

 

[Ianno87]

'Shamed' despite sticking to social distancing rules

Even those abiding by the lockdown regulations can find themselves the target for shaming.

www.bbc.co.uk

Coronavirus: Neighbour reports ‘selfish’ commuting NHS worker for 'non-essential car trips'

Sam Halms, who works at the Norfolk & Suffolk Mental Health Foundation Trust, defended herself after a neighbour mistakenly named her ‘part of the problem’.

uk.news.yahoo.com

While there are a tiny minority of people who are breaking the rules, there is also another minority of extremely vocal people who appear to be in a competition to be as sanctimonious and accusatory as they possibly can be. They can be judgemental; they can use hyperbole, they can be rude and they tend to be unaware of what the legislation actually says (while thinking they are experts).

So far I've not encountered anyone like this personally (so far) but if I do, I will be up for an argument with them.

More importantly, they are usually just more interested in sniping / getting one up / humiliating someone, using 'public good' as the cover for being nasty and spiteful.

 

[GRALISTAIR]

Some people love to feel that they can judge other people and - more sadly - shame them on social media. It is an unpleasant trait. We are supposed to be in this together, supporting others where necessary. Thankfully most people are respecting the rules and in many cases giving up their time to make this a bit more bearable for those who are struggling.

Sadly you are correct. As you say "We are supposed to be in this together"

 

[Mag_seven]

If someone shouts at you in the street or posts a letter through your door or posts a note on your car then it is clear that they are breaking the social distancing rules as none of those activities are reasonable excuses to leave your home therefore they should be fined.

 

[Cowley]

If someone shouts at you in the street or posts a letter through your door or posts a note on your car then it is clear that they are breaking the social distancing rules as none of those activities are reasonable excuses to leave your home therefore they should be fined.

Well that’s a good point!

 

[Bantamzen]

Shaming of one kind or another seems to have become all too commonplace in our society, and covid-shaming seems to have taken on more than any other type. One thing I am not looking forward to once things start to move again is people getting bent out of shape because someone coughs, sneezes (covering mouth and nose of course), or even just looks hot & bothered when out and about. Once these kind of habits creep in, they are hard to shake.

 

[Qwerty133]

I make no apologies for thinking that some people following the guidance are being obnoxious. Just because it is technically permitted it doesn't mean you should be walking your dog off lead so that you have to keep stopping every 20 metres for it to catch up on footpaths barely wider than 2 meters which are almost impossible to safely pass on. I also have no problem with thinking those families walking on such paths holding hands and not moving into single file when people approach in the other direction are selfish. In most areas places to walk are limited and therefore people need to be able to share such paths which requires people to continuously walk at a reasonable pace and only stop o when it is absolutely necessary, for example to wait at a wider point for someone walking in the opposite direction, and in such cases to do so at the very edge of the path.

 

[Bletchleyite]

I also have no problem with thinking those families walking on such paths holding hands and not moving into single file when people approach in the other direction are selfish.

Because I am not too scared of catching it and think I have already had it, my actions are generally based around not spreading it to others, so I have decided that I will not move off a path to avoid a group who are walking in more than single file, I will walk leaving space as if they were in single file in most cases (except the obviously elderly and infirm), and anyone not moving into single file is choosing to elevate their own risk.

 

[matt_world2004]

I've noticed on social media those being the most sanctimonious are also those who are flouting the rules themselves.

 

[GRALISTAIR]

If someone shouts at you in the street or posts a letter through your door or posts a note on your car then it is clear that they are breaking the social distancing rules as none of those activities are reasonable excuses to leave your home therefore they should be fined.

Well that’s a good point!

Indeed it is.

 

[Islineclear3_1]

Sadly the world is full of self-rightoeus, judgemental people who appear to have too much time on their hands

Don't judge a book by its cover and make sure you get your facts straight first. Sadly people are quick to jump in on one

 

[tony_mac]

Meanwhile, of course, there are thousands of people who are breaking the law, and whose actions will ultimately cost more lives.
Personally, I think people dying is a bigger problem than upsetting some people who don't deserve it.

 

[Arglwydd Golau]

If the person who confronted the health Worker about not being in uniform thought about it for a minute she might have a different view...my partner used to go to work (nurse) in uniform but quite rightly changes when she reaches the hospital and also changes before she comes home! Obvious really!

 

[farleigh]

Meanwhile, of course, there are thousands of people who are breaking the law, and whose actions will ultimately cost more lives.
Personally, I think people dying is a bigger problem than upsetting some people who don't deserve it.

Do you think the internet shaming etc is a good thing then?

 

[bramling]

More importantly, they are usually just more interested in sniping / getting one up / humiliating someone, using 'public good' as the cover for being nasty and spiteful.

This couple might have good reason for being sanctimonious.

Self-isolating Stroud couple had to leave their home after car crash

Robin Deane said it sounded "like a bomb had gone off" when the car crashed into the house.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[matt_world2004]

Meanwhile, of course, there are thousands of people who are breaking the law, and whose actions will ultimately cost more lives.
Personally, I think people dying is a bigger problem than upsetting some people who don't deserve it.

Does confronting people, without any authority to do so - who are suspected of breaking the rules help on anyway? I suspect not

 

[tony_mac]

Does confronting people, without any authority to do so - who are suspected of breaking the rules help on anyway? I suspect not

I suspect not as well - but I can understand it. A lot of people are scared and upset - they know that they, their friends, or their family may well not all survive this epidemic, and they just want it over with as soon as possible. Seeing people openly doing things they shouldn't, which will prolong the outbreak, is upsetting.
For every person incorrectly confronted, I suspect there are many more that were doing something wrong - I see dozens every day - but they don't complain to the press about it. I also suspect that they don't care what strangers think, or they wouldn't be doing it in the first place.

 

[lyndhurst25]

Despite being at least 3 metres away, I got tutted at and told to my distance by a terrified pair of middle-aged women shopping together in Tesco Express the other day. They then proceeded to queue for the tills in the wrong isle, messing up the one-way system, and then finally split up to use the two available checkouts separately. One of them bought a few groceries, while the other one bought her essential items - a bundle of lottery tickets. I just had a little chuckle to myself. No point in getting judgemental.

 

[Domh245]

A bit of understanding goes a long way, be that waiting behind somebody in the supermarket, or not jumping to conclusions when you see someone at a neighbours door! That doesn't mean that it doesn't go both ways though - if you're going to be stood for a while looking at something, try to stand as far aside as possible and indicate what you're doing so that people can pass you whilst still maintaining a reasonable distance, or back out to a bit of the store where they can pass you at 2m before going back.

When out shopping a couple of days ago, a few people went past me whilst I was looking at stuff on the shelf, but I certainly didn't feel the need to start going off on one at them, although I suppose I might be a bit more annoyed if I were more vulnerable to (or bothered about!) catching the virus.

 

[Ianno87]

Despite being at least 3 metres away, I got tutted at and told to my distance by a terrified pair of middle-aged women shopping together in Tesco Express the other day. They then proceeded to queue for the tills in the wrong isle, messing up the one-way system, and then finally split up to use the two available checkouts separately. One of them bought a few groceries, while the other one bought her essential items - a bundle of lottery tickets. I just had a little chuckle to myself. No point in getting judgemental.

I've spotted a bit of a trend of ladies of a certain age continuing to meet up to meet up in the park (or wherever) and making a half-arsed effort to maintain 2 metre distance. Applying the "but I always see Ethel on a Wednesday, a lockdown won't stop me" school of thought.

My local supermarket is an absolute nightmare.

They have put tape on the floor to introduce a one way system but it is completely ignored by some and take their kids and let them run about. Likewise the social distancing aspect, some people just don't care. The thing that did grind my gears though was the guy the other week who spent about 5 minutes, probably closer to 2 in reality, looking at the ingredient on a tub of cottage cheese whilst 3 of us, all distancing properly, had to stand about like spare you know whats at a wedding.

Have to admit I personally only twigged the relevence of the arrows on the floor for the first time today... Not that I'm sure following them is massively important provided distance is maintained (i.e. you can often avoid more people by *not* following them if intelligence is applied)

 

[DarloRich]

It could be said some sanctimonious and judgmental individuals are shaming people being sanctimonious and judgmental individuals.

 

[farleigh]

I think it is time that we started informing the authorities of anybody not clapping long enough or vigorously enough on a Thursday.

 

[nlogax]

I think it is time that we started informing the authorities of anybody not clapping long enough or vigorously enough on a Thursday.

A friend of mine was given the shaming treatment over the Easter weekend for not turning out on her building's communal hallway to clap last week. In response she pointed out to her somewhat judgmental neighbor that for that entire Thursday evening she'd be working hard to help orchestrate NHS responses for certain parts of the country. Not a peep more was heard..

 

[AM9]

I make no apologies for thinking that some people following the guidance are being obnoxious. Just because it is technically permitted it doesn't mean you should be walking your dog off lead so that you have to keep stopping every 20 metres for it to catch up on footpaths barely wider than 2 meters which are almost impossible to safely pass on. I also have no problem with thinking those families walking on such paths holding hands and not moving into single file when people approach in the other direction are selfish. In most areas places to walk are limited and therefore people need to be able to share such paths which requires people to continuously walk at a reasonable pace and only stop o when it is absolutely necessary, for example to wait at a wider point for someone walking in the opposite direction, and in such cases to do so at the very edge of the path.

Occasionally people walking two abreast on constrained narrow'ish paths forget. That is obvious by the embarassed look (and sometimes apology) when I make a point of purposefully stepping back to the hedge/fence. That's fine.
On rarer occasions on slightly busier paths, there are groups who don't give any speace to those walking ahead of me, so my strategy is to fake a wheezy cough or sneeze into a tissue. That usually gets a result! So far, they haven't said anything to me, - I would welcome that opportunity to comment on their distancing practices, in a normal non-wheezy voice of course!

 

[Bantamzen]

Occasionally people walking two abreast on constrained narrow'ish paths forget. That is obvious by the embarassed look (and sometimes apology) when I make a point of purposefully stepping back to the hedge/fence. That's fine.
On rarer occasions on slightly busier paths, there are groups who don't give any speace to those walking ahead of me, so my strategy is to fake a wheezy cough or sneeze into a tissue. That usually gets a result! So far, they haven't said anything to me, - I would welcome that opportunity to comment on their distancing practices, in a normal non-wheezy voice of course!

You might want to be careful doing that, they might report you...

 

[Mag_seven]

If anyone wants to discuss the issues surrounding Clapping for the NHS, then please use this thread.

Clapping for the NHS

Moderator note: Split from https://www.railforums.co.uk/threads/some-sanctimonious-and-judgemental-individuals-ar-shaming-law-abiding-citizens.203469 A friend of mine was given the shaming treatment over the Easter weekend for not turning out on her building's communal hallway to clap last...

www.railforums.co.uk

Thanks.

 

[robbeech]

It seems to be increasingly in people's nature to "get one over" on any form of authoritarian body, it is not limited to this situation. In the same way that people drive 34 in a 30mph speed limit as they know that they will not be ticketed for doing so, and they make a point of smoking as close to a doorway as the law permits, people are pushing the limits of where you can walk or cycle for the sole purpose of pushing the law to the limit. It's pretty sad, but its how a umber of people are programmed these days. I'm thankful that most people just go out for a walk or bike ride and go back home, but with the appalling attitude of some theres no wonder there are frequent altercations.

 

[Ianno87]

You might want to be careful doing that, they might report you...

Quite reasonable, given that it could quite easily be constituted as assault in the current climate (if done in too close proximity or too obviously 'forced')

 

[Meerkat]

Obviously vigilantism is out of order but we do need a lot of peer group pressure.
There aren’t enough police to control those who think something is only wrong if you get caught, and most of us just seethe internally.
Its like planning - most of us are too busy/timid to protest so without the busybodies that keep an eye out developers and individuals would utterly take the mick.