The Daily Star said:The Daily Star can today exclusively reveal today that the Tardis, star of the new series of Doctor Who, is to sensationally quit at the end of Season 3.
A show insider said today It was a risk to cast the Tardis as his windows were too big but the gamble paid off as audiences warmed to him. Although he was often criticised by fans for being to wide, the public at large have taken him and his weight problems to their hearts. It was only a matter of time before ITV would try to poach him.
The Tardis, who is in a high profile relationship with the Phone Booth from the Bill and Ted films, is said to be considering some lucrative offers from ITV and other Broadcasters. One of these offers is said to be a multi-million pound offer to play a Port-a-loo in the life story of George Michael.
A friend said The part will be challenging for him as it will require him using his Chameleon Circuit for the first time in years but he is confident he can cope with the change.
However, the BBC officially rubbished the rumours, a spokesman said What are you on, its a bloody wooden prop for gods sake.
Current rumours suggest that Elizabeth Hurley will be cast as the Tardis replacement. A close friend of the Production Team said She is ideal for the role, youd have to go a long way to find anyone else as wooden.