TARDIS quits Doctor Who

[bunnahabhain]

The Daily Star can today exclusively reveal today that the Tardis, star of the new series of Doctor Who, is to sensationally quit at the end of Season 3.

A show insider said today “It was a risk to cast the Tardis as his window’s were too big but the gamble paid off as audiences warmed to him. Although he was often criticised by fans for being to wide, the public at large have taken him and his weight problems to their hearts. It was only a matter of time before ITV would try to poach him“.

The Tardis, who is in a high profile relationship with the Phone Booth from the Bill and Ted films, is said to be considering some lucrative offers from ITV and other Broadcasters. One of these offers is said to be a multi-million pound offer to play a Port-a-loo in the life story of George Michael.

A friend said “The part will be challenging for him as it will require him using his Chameleon Circuit for the first time in years but he is confident he can cope with the change.“

However, the BBC officially rubbished the rumours, a spokesman said “What are you on, it’s a bloody wooden prop for god’s sake.”

Current rumours suggest that Elizabeth Hurley will be cast as the Tardis’ replacement. A close friend of the Production Team said “She is ideal for the role, you’d have to go a long way to find anyone else as wooden.”

 

[Coxster]

Right...

 

[HSTfan!!!]

hehe loving it

 

[Tom B]

It's exactly the sort of stuff the Daily Star would print, too...

 

[Guinness]

It's exactly the sort of stuff the Daily Star would print, too...

Hopefully under the fit 19 year old Babe with the huge knockers. :happy3:

 

[bunnahabhain]

But Babe is a pig.....and I didnt realise pigs reached 19 months without appearing on my plate as bacon......mmmm...bacon

 

[Guinness]

But Babe is a pig.....and I didnt realise pigs reached 19 months without appearing on my plate as bacon......mmmm...bacon

Didn't know Pigs called grow huge tits.

 

[bunnahabhain]

Yeah, about 12 of them. They normally secrete milky white stuff when nibbled.

 

[Guinness]

Yeah, about 12 of them. They normally secrete milky white stuff when nibbled.

Thought they were nipples not breasts.

 

[bunnahabhain]

I'll go and RTFM.

I've RTFM'd, yup, they're Nip Piggles, http://images.imagesource.com/preview/wmcomps/IS258-021.jpg

 

[Tom B]

Hmm - I always say that, in general, IQ is a reciprocal of bra size .

 

[devon_metro]

Oh i am i reading what i have just read

 

[The Gricer]

Oh i am i reading what i have just read

Yeah, I'm afraid so! :grin: Yet another of those interesting and informative threads that make this forum such an education!

It does beg the question though, how does Jamie know about the nibbling bit?


Frank

 

[bunnahabhain]

I was just doing it for the double entendres