The Kings Cross hologram-a new form of torture

Discussion in 'Infrastructure & Stations' started by TUC, 11 Oct 2013.

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  1. Deerfold

    Deerfold Established Member

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    Ah, if only.
     
  2. table38

    table38 Established Member

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    These are not the elevators you are looking for :)
     
  3. Tetchytyke

    Tetchytyke Established Member

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    They can go dump them under Manchester Victoria station, they'll be right at home with the cab from 142059.

    I love the Tensator blog:

    Are these people pathologically incapable of speaking English?
     
  4. Welly

    Welly Member

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    In the hospital I work at a few years ago, we actually had cardboard cutouts of a nurse with motion sensors outside each ward. The motion sensor would activate a pre-recorded voice message reminding visitors to use the alcohol hand cleaners as part of infection control against MRSA etc. They became very annoying and some wag managed to hack at least one to play the "Top Cat" TV theme tune; also one was stolen and left in the nearby park! Those things were dispensed with within a year.

    Hopefully someone will hack some appropriate TV theme tune to that thing at KX - Red Dwarf Theme tune?
     
  5. michael769

    michael769 Established Member

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    Don't give them ideas!

    "You were not expecting your train to be on time"
     
  6. edwin_m

    edwin_m Veteran Member

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    You're gonna need a bigger lift.
     
  7. NorthernSpirit

    NorthernSpirit On Moderation

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    I think someone has booted the one by the gates in Leeds, the figure thing doesn't line up with the cut out. :lol:

    One of them things or better still the whole of Network Rail's hologram units should be placed on the track at Silverstone or Brands Hatch and the things smashed to pieces by passing cars with a long metal bar fitted to the offside. Would be quite entertaining to see actually.
     
  8. table38

    table38 Established Member

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    It's about time we fought back, especially as they seem to be breeding.

     
  9. jon0844

    jon0844 Veteran Member

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    I've mentioned it in another thread, but St Albans City now has this thing - and it has TWO women. A FCC woman warning about keeping clear of the yellow line and slippery surfaces etc, followed by the same woman changing costume into a BTP uniform and talking about security.

    Scary!

    (Edit; when I say two women - I mean one machine, but when one woman finishes, it fades out and she reappears in a different uniform and a different message.)
     
    Last edited: 7 Jul 2014
  10. NorthernSpirit

    NorthernSpirit On Moderation

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    These need to be installed at unstaffed stations, I wonder how long they would last.

    If one was installed at Thorne South or at Wakefield Kirkgate the thing would be wrecked after an hour. First the cutout would be obliterated (the the thing would be in smithereens), followed by either a size nine or a hammer through the speaker then the projector would have a brick put through it.
     
  11. Class377

    Class377 Member

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    You beat me to it by a day - I noticed it on Saturday.

    It's tucked away in one of the most pointless areas so you'll only hear her droning voice, re-iterating mostly what is said over the tannoy anyway.

    It would have been a hundred times better if they'd have got a hologram of James instead of that damned woman!
     
  12. jon0844

    jon0844 Veteran Member

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    James can definitely stay, but she can perhaps move further along down the platform as time goes. Until she ends up in the sea at Brighton.

    To be fair, most people queue up for tickets compared to using the various TVMs, so while they queue they can see and hear the announcements. And then see and hear the announcements. And then see and hear the announcements.

    The regulars who will want this thing destroyed would ignore it anyway.

    But perhaps the real reason for its location is that the local staff that had it forced upon them hate it too and that's as far away as they can get it.

    Here it is by the way: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcRSw4tKn2U
     
    Last edited: 8 Jul 2014
  13. Class377

    Class377 Member

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    I do wonder what on earth possessed them to think buying these was a good idea - we used to just have announcements to give us this information, what's so necessary about having a video on cardboard to make us pay more attention?
     
  14. jon0844

    jon0844 Veteran Member

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    Someone at Network Rail responsible for purchasing got invited to some lavish party or event, or some other incentive?

    The one at St Albans is very loud. You can hear it outside. Sooner or later it will be turned down, or else it will end up being destroyed!

    Presumably these are going to appear at loads of stations, so someone is making a LOT of money. And in another thread there are people moaning about a fine levied on Network Rail, but how much have they, or will they, spend on these?
     
  15. 47802

    47802 On Moderation

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    Coming back from New York a couple of months ago via JFK I noticed a distinct lack of British style Health and Safety and general nanny state on the escalators so I could take my luggage up them no problem.

    Of Course arriving at Manchester and heading for the station there was the escalator with a narrow gap to try stop people taking luggage on it. Anyway as my luggage was narrow enough to fit through the gap I ignored it.

    Says a lot about this country these days I think.
     
    Last edited: 8 Jul 2014
  16. GatwickDepress

    GatwickDepress Established Member

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    "nanny state", "says a lot about this country" Sorry, but I find those phrases to be absolute tosh, in the context of the holograms!

    Rather than covering liability or "nannying", I honestly think some Network Rail director of procurement was approached by a corporate salesperson at an industry do, and was somehow, somehow convinced to order these bulky, outdated, braying nuisances.
     
  17. Class377

    Class377 Member

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    Let me get this straight - you're calling me a troll for suggesting these holograms are pointless?

    People don't pay attention to them at Kings Cross anyway, so please explain how they have been a good use of money befor levelling such accusations.
     
  18. meridian2

    meridian2 Established Member

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    So 'nanny state' isn't a load of tosh, then, as you've admitted it might be because of liability issues.
    As for 'approached by someone who was somehow convinced', give me a break! They made the conscientious decision to install the holograms ergo they are worried about liability.
    At the end of the day, this isn't Dragon's Den.
     
  19. duncanp

    duncanp Member

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    I feel sorry for the people who work at the Caffe Nero shop at the bottom of one of the escalators. They have to listen to that stupid woman all day long.

    If I worked there I would proabaly turn into Victor Meldrew or Basil Fawlty and tell her to shut up, or something stronger.

    Just what on earth is wrong with taking luggage on escalators anyway.

    Oh and by the way it is a "lift" in this country, not an "elevator".
     
  20. GatwickDepress

    GatwickDepress Established Member

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    I've always believed the "nanny state" to mean an apparent meddling of the state in people's lives, of which the holograms most certainly are not. They're more conveying potentially useful safety advisories in an exceedingly clumsy, irritating, and completely useless way.

    It's not Dragon's Den, but Network Rail, like most organisations, will have rather strange people in suits among their ranks who talk in buzzwords and who honestly believe that gimmicks will provide both the solutions and the publicity they desire. Not that it's not about liability, but if it was, there are cheaper and less... "innovative blue-sky envelope-pushing" ways to do it. FCC's ticket hall at St Pancakes is a good example, I think. I hope it doesn't have a hologram now, I didn't see one when I was there last week... :s

    What does get my goat is that the blasted woman doesn't explain why you shouldn't take luggage on the escalator. If you are ignorant of the risks, you probably won't listen unless you are taught why.

    Personally, one of those quiet animated poster boards, subtitled in suitable touristy languages, would have more effect on me than that projection of verbal diarrhoea personified.
     
  21. meridian2

    meridian2 Established Member

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    Ah, now I see your point. Yes I agree with you that in this case, it is not an example of the 'nanny state', however, I still think NR are being overtly paranoid about people who bring luggage onto escalators and then sue them for falling down them.
    NR should not have to pay for people's lack of common sense, and in this case, I think it's quite sad that we have to be lumbered with a cheap, tacky, piece of technology just because some people can't resist jumping on the gravy train if they have an accident.
    Hence why I agreed with an earlier post's sentiment about it being typical of modern day Britain.
     
  22. jon0844

    jon0844 Veteran Member

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    Have there been any attempted claims against Network Rail? Are there likely to be? Are any likely to succeed?

    There are escalators everywhere throughout the world. Many in places where people will have large bags, buggies, bikes etc. Do they all have these projectors on max volume? Will they need to in the future? And if they don't, will they be targeted by a new breed of 'fall for cash' scammers?

    We all know of organisations that have no idea about health and safety and take things to extremes, and I suspect this is another good - no great - example.

    Sent from my LG-D855 using Tapatalk
     
  23. Tetchytyke

    Tetchytyke Established Member

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    I'm not even convinced that Network Rail would be able to avoid liability if someone got injured by a flying suitcase on an escalator. If you prohibit something but don't enforce it, a good lawyer would argue that you're still liable.

    Obviously a Network Rail director has believed the PR gobbledegook from Tensator. They were on here in this thread asking for feedback, only to tell us we were wrong when we gave them it. The procurement people will only hear Tensator telling them that passengers love the "friendly voice and smile" of the hologram.
     
  24. jon0844

    jon0844 Veteran Member

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    Does anyone know how much they cost? They'll almost certainly be four figures, and then I'd also like to know how many Network Rail has bought or agreed to buy.

    Oh, and how much it will be to record the video (and re-record in the case of FCC changing to Govia).

    Sent from my LG-D855 using Tapatalk
     
  25. Skimble19

    Skimble19 Established Member

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    There may be a few more popping up around FCC before September unfortunately.. Hopefully Govia won't be quite so keen!
     
  26. EbbwJunction1

    EbbwJunction1 Member

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    I must say that I didn't know what this topic was all about as I haven't seen one "in the flesh" as it were.

    However, that is seriously weird! I don't understand why they've adopted them - whatever is the point?

    :(
     
  27. Kite159

    Kite159 Veteran Member

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    No doubt they will probably still be saying FCC for years to come ;)
     
  28. stut

    stut Established Member

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    What they really need to do is employ some escalator bouncers. Luggage? Not coming in. Drunk? Not coming in. Missing an arm? You must be joking. White trainers? Yeah, try the elevator sonny. Not carrying a dog? Rules are rules...

    Naturally, to pay for them, they will have to introduce some kind of escalator toll, payable by Oyster card. This will be levied on elevator customers too, with peak time increases to discourage use at heavy times (this is a far better solution than increasing capacity).

    This will doubtless lead to people carrying luggage on the stairs, which is even more dangerous. So bouncers will need to be positioned on the stairs next to M&S as well. The toll on this staircase will be slightly less, that's free market capitalism for you.

    For those wishing to visit the restaurants and not use the bridge (there is an alternative route, after all), the Left Luggage company will offer an hourly special tariff, with 10% off the day rate.

    It makes sense, you know. People can't be trusted.
     
  29. talldave

    talldave Established Member

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    Although there are no holograms, at Gatwick station you get shouted at on the escalators with the phrase "you are approaching the end of the escalator, do not block the landing area".

    Now, at an airport, my brain hears the phrase "landing area" and conjures up images of runways and planes....mildly disconcerting when I think I'm heading onto a train platform.

    So is there a corporate black book of unusual terms to use when plain English would do?
     
  30. jon0844

    jon0844 Veteran Member

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    It would be quite convenient to be taken straight to the runway, especially for the airlines that make you board from the ground. I bet there would be some crazy person thinking there was some silly health and safety issue with that though.

    I guess in these days of blue sky thinking and thinking outside of the box, using unfamiliar terminology is considered ingress.
     
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