Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[Calthrop]

Slightly off on a tangent to that. I once read a German translation of Nevil Shute’s novel Pastoral, which is set on a World War II bomber base, but includes raids over Germany. The German translation was fairly accurate, except that all the German target cities were substituted by French and Belgian ones.

I've been trying to figure out what could possibly have been the German translators' thought processes leading to their doing this -- cannot find a way to see same as being particularly admirable, "whichever way you slice it".

Don't think I've previously heard of Pastoral by Shute: feel inclined to give it a try -- the majority of works by him which I have read, I've liked.

 

[HST274]

And their Swedish cousins: Jävlar myggor!

On my last scottish trip I was just glad we missed the clegs

 

[leytongabriel]

WanSTEAD Park on the Goblin announcements. However did they arrive at that pronunciation?

 

[iantherev]

Transport photographers who post on social media and then spend most of the post moaning about how much better the photograph would have been had the weather/location/traction been different. If you don't like the end result don't post it.

 

[BananaRepublic]

I’ve not read most of the 43 pages (so far) and don’t know if these have been mentioned?

I would ban walking in a public street, holding out cups of coffee and other drinks in disposable or reusable cups.
You know, the Costa or Starbucks types of drink, held out in front of a person.
Purely because it looks stupid.

Secondly, I’d ban eating fast food, or any food for that matter, whilst walking in a public place.
Anyone caught walking down the street eating a burger or chips, or even a packet of crisps for example, should be immediately arrested and locked up for 24 hours.
Littering with take away containers or wrappers, punishable by death…..by throwing the miscreant into a waste recycling machine.



z

 

[nlogax]

I would ban walking in a public street, holding out cups of coffee and other drinks in disposable or reusable cups.

So you'd ban..what..all drinking while walking? What am I missing here? And why do you think it looks stupid?

 

[GusB]

I would ban walking in a public street, holding out cups of coffee and other drinks in disposable or reusable cups.
You know, the Costa or Starbucks types of drink, held out in front of a person.
Purely because it looks stupid.

Secondly, I’d ban eating fast food, or any food for that matter, whilst walking in a public place.
Anyone caught walking down the street eating a burger or chips, or even a packet of crisps for example, should be immediately arrested and locked up for 24 hours.

Should we all be walking with coffee cups held behind us instead? That would certainly look stupid.

 

[Cowley]

Should we all be walking with coffee cups held behind us instead? That would certainly look stupid.

I was carrying a coffee along the platform at Paddington fairly recently and I slipped on the shiny paving and threw the entire cup of coffee straight into my face and hair…
The guy walking past me at the time had a mask on so all I could see was the astonishment in his eyes so I don’t know if he was laughing but I would have done.
I therefore ban shiny floor surfaces in public places from this moment on.

Oh and everyone that uses festival toilets apart from me.

 

[trainophile]

Online station maps that you can't actually read. Most of them are no use whatsoever if you're trying to pre-plan your connection at a major station. Someone should produce proper legible maps where you can read the platform numbers and clearly see how to get between them.

 

[Ianno87]

Bank Holidays not being spread evenly across the year.

 

[trainophile]

Bank Holidays not being spread evenly across the year.

They were saying on the radio this morning that we should get 12 bank holidays a year instead of the current 8. Don't people get enough statutory annual leave nowadays to render the whole concept unnecessary? It just throws everything into pandemonium, and as observed last week/weekend the transport systems just can't cope.

 

[HST274]

They were saying on the radio this morning that we should get 12 bank holidays a year instead of the current 8. Don't people get enough statutory annual leave nowadays to render the whole concept unnecessary? It just throws everything into pandemonium, and as observed last week/weekend the transport systems just can't cope.

Try telling that to school goers

 

[yorksrob]

They were saying on the radio this morning that we should get 12 bank holidays a year instead of the current 8. Don't people get enough statutory annual leave nowadays to render the whole concept unnecessary? It just throws everything into pandemonium, and as observed last week/weekend the transport systems just can't cope.

No, they don't.

Personally I think we should move towards the four day working week, but failing that, additional bank holidays would help.

 

[trainophile]

No, they don't.

Personally I think we should move towards the four day working week, but failing that, additional bank holidays would help.

Well we're going that way with working from home either full or part time. If you have a set amount to achieve and you can do so in four days, plus be contactable for emergencies on the fifth, then why not? Of course I appreciate this doesn't work for probably still the majority of businesses where physical presence is a necessity, but I suppose by employing extra staff they could work out 4-day rotas. Would people still expect five days pay though?

 

[yorksrob]

Well we're going that way with working from home either full or part time. If you have a set amount to achieve and you can do so in four days, plus be contactable for emergencies on the fifth, then why not? Of course I appreciate this doesn't work for probably still the majority of businesses where physical presence is a necessity, but I suppose by employing extra staff they could work out 4-day rotas. Would people still expect five days pay though?

I don't really count four days on, one day on call as being a proper four day week. The three days should be pure leisure.

 

[trainophile]

I don't really count four days on, one day on call as being a proper four day week. The three days should be pure leisure.

Fair enough if you'll settle for four days pay! You can do that now if you negotiate.

 

[PeterY]

One thing that really annoys me, is people who park over drop down curbs, that are used by wheelchairs, buggies and us cyclists Punishment should be automatic towing away of offending vehicles

 

[Gloster]

It is often said that the UK has fewer bank holidays than most countries in Europe, but in many countries some of them fall on a fixed date. If the date falls on a Sunday, you don’t get Monday off instead: Sunday it is and no other.

 

[Techniquest]

They were saying on the radio this morning that we should get 12 bank holidays a year instead of the current 8. Don't people get enough statutory annual leave nowadays to render the whole concept unnecessary? It just throws everything into pandemonium, and as observed last week/weekend the transport systems just can't cope.

I agree, it's an outdated concept and Bank Holidays are just an incredibly annoying relic for those of us who work in industries which don't shut down for them.

MORE Bank Holidays can go away, it's bad enough already. I'd also make Sunday a full, normal day of work and get rid of Sunday trading hours. That relic of the past needs to go away too. Maybe we should re-introduce shorter opening hours in the pubs, and close them on Sundays...

As for the 4 day week someone else suggested, no. Unless we move that to include people working on Saturdays and Sundays, with their days off falling on weekdays instead. That's how a lot of us already get our 'weekends' so perhaps it should become a reality for others?

I don't like Bank Holidays if it's not obvious! Too much chaos gets caused by them, so they can absolutely get banned! Want the extra day off to make it a long weekend? Book it off as normal holiday time, like much of the world already does!

 

[yorksrob]

I agree, it's an outdated concept and Bank Holidays are just an incredibly annoying relic for those of us who work in industries which don't shut down for them.

MORE Bank Holidays can go away, it's bad enough already. I'd also make Sunday a full, normal day of work and get rid of Sunday trading hours. That relic of the past needs to go away too. Maybe we should re-introduce shorter opening hours in the pubs, and close them on Sundays...

As for the 4 day week someone else suggested, no. Unless we move that to include people working on Saturdays and Sundays, with their days off falling on weekdays instead. That's how a lot of us already get our 'weekends' so perhaps it should become a reality for others?

I don't like Bank Holidays if it's not obvious! Too much chaos gets caused by them, so they can absolutely get banned! Want the extra day off to make it a long weekend? Book it off as normal holiday time, like much of the world already does!

Working hours need to be reduced generally so that more people have more leisure time. For leisure industries I imagine that the week would have two shifts of people deciding between them which of the proper weekend days they would work.

We live in a leisure orientated economy, so it would be beneficial for lower paid people to be paid comparatively more for their work and to have more time in which to spend their money.

 

[trainophile]

One thing that really annoys me, is people who park over drop down curbs, that are used by wheelchairs, buggies and us cyclists Punishment should be automatic towing away of offending vehicles

To wheel your bicycle into your drive I trust you mean?

Working hours need to be reduced generally so that more people have more leisure time. For leisure industries I imagine that the week would have two shifts of people deciding between them which of the proper weekend days they would work.

We live in a leisure orientated economy, so it would be beneficial for lower paid people to be paid comparatively more for their work and to have more time in which to spend their money.

Can't help feeling there's a flaw in your logic there .

 

[yorksrob]

To wheel your bicycle into your drive I trust you mean?



Can't help feeling there's a flaw in your logic there .

Not at all. We're moving to a situation where automation will mean too many people for too few jobs. The for day week will alleviate this.

 

[trainophile]

Not at all. We're moving to a situation where automation will mean too many people for too few jobs. The for day week will alleviate this.

Well there's a staff shortage at present apparently. If all the remaining HGV drivers demand five days pay for four days work the situation will become unsustainable.

 

[yorksrob]

Well there's a staff shortage at present apparently. If all the remaining HGV drivers demand five days pay for four days work the situation will become unsustainable.

That's a temporary hiccup caused by specific circumstances. The direction of travel is in the opposite direction.

 

[HST274]

I'd also make Sunday a full, normal day of work and get rid of Sunday trading hours. That relic of the past needs to go away too.

So are you advocating a six day week? Or treating it like Saturday or a weekday where only some people work or...

 

[SteveM70]

People who go to football matches and then proceed to scream criticism of “their” team regardless of how well they’re doing. This criticism is often contradictory too.

For example, at Halifax v Alteincham today, the bloke in the next but one seat seemed distinctly unimpressed with Halifax passing the ball from defence into midfield. “GERRIT FORRAD!!!!!!”

Five minutes later a long ball forward elicited a “BLOODY PASS IT!!!!”

For the record, Halifax played pretty well and for the fifth division kept the ball well and passed it tidily.

 

[Ianno87]

People who go to football matches and then proceed to scream criticism of “their” team regardless of how well they’re doing. This criticism is often contradictory too.

For example, at Halifax v Alteincham today, the bloke in the next but one seat seemed distinctly unimpressed with Halifax passing the ball from defence into midfield. “GERRIT FORRAD!!!!!!”

Five minutes later a long ball forward elicited a “BLOODY PASS IT!!!!”

For the record, Halifax played pretty well and for the fifth division kept the ball well and passed it tidily.

Reminds me of... (caution, some strong language)

 

[scotrail158713]

People who go to football matches and then proceed to scream criticism of “their” team regardless of how well they’re doing. This criticism is often contradictory too.

For example, at Halifax v Alteincham today, the bloke in the next but one seat seemed distinctly unimpressed with Halifax passing the ball from defence into midfield. “GERRIT FORRAD!!!!!!”

Five minutes later a long ball forward elicited a “BLOODY PASS IT!!!!”

For the record, Halifax played pretty well and for the fifth division kept the ball well and passed it tidily.

On the football theme I would also add pointless phrases that nobody truly knows the meaning to. What really is a "slide-rule pass" and how do a team "play through the thirds"? These were two that I heard just this weekend alone.

 

[SteveM70]

On the football theme I would also add pointless phrases that nobody truly knows the meaning to. What really is a "slide-rule pass" and how do a team "play through the thirds"? These were two that I heard just this weekend alone.

Play through the thirds = pass defence to midfield, then pass midfield to attack, basically. The opposite of hoofball

 

[Techniquest]

So are you advocating a six day week? Or treating it like Saturday or a weekday where only some people work or...

Apologies, I should have made that clearer in my previous post.

My suggestion is to make weekends part of a normal week, nothing special about them as they're not really. Sundays have no particular importance as such to them these days, why do we insist on having restricted hours of operations still? The amount of people who think working both Saturdays and Sundays is unfair is just mind-blowing. It's a normal day, I don't personally particularly care. I have Wednesdays and Thursdays off, yes I work both Saturdays and Sundays but big woop. "Oh I couldn't do that" is a regular thing it appears, why not I don't know.

If it was working 6 days a week every week, then yes that would be nuts. I know some people who do regularly work 6 day weeks, I do think they're crazy for doing it, but it's not compulsory.

I don't personally see why Sunday has to be treated any different to any other day of the week, and I don't see a need for Bank Holidays. I get a generous holiday allowance every year, quite I struggle to make proper use of it really!

Now there's a money-spinner of an idea, selling my unused holiday days to those who want them...