Trivia: Most ridiculous job titles used on the railway.

[busestrains]

I was just reading this thread and discovered that Lumo (which itself is a ridiculous name for a TOC) use the job title "Customer Driver" for their drivers:

Incident on 20:27 Lumo train 28th December

Tonight the 20:27 Lumo service to Edinburgh made an unscheduled stop at Grantham to eject a rowdy passenger. A young man had to be removed due to trying to wrestle everyone in the carriage. The Customer Hosts told him to stop although he ignored them and said they couldn’t do anything. The...

www.railforums.co.uk

Customer Driver has to be the most ridiculous job title i have ever heard! I thought that C2C was bad using the name "Train Captain" for their Guards but Customer Driver is taking job titles to a new level of stupidity! I have no idea who thought that Customer Driver was a sensible job title! I can guarantee you that no passenger will ever refer to them as that!

What other ridiculous or poorly named job titles exist on our railway?

In my opinion these are the worst four job titles used:

• Customer Driver
• Senior Conductor
• Train Captain
• Train Manager

Train Manager is used by so many TOCs but sounds ridiculous. It sounds like someone who should be sitting in the TOC head office behind a computer running and managing the train company. When you think of a Train Manager it does not sound like someone who works onboard a train.

Senior Conductor is ridiculous because they get called Senior Conductor even when they are brand new to the railway and have just started the job. Senior Conductor sounds like someone who has been a Conductor for many years and then moved up to a higher rank. Just call them a Conductor instead. Or even better just scrap the term Conductor and call them a Guard like in the old days.

I would be interested to hear your opinions and views on other ridiculous job titles used on the railway?

 

[michael74]

I was just reading this thread and discovered that Lumo (which itself is a ridiculous name for a TOC) use the job title "Customer Driver" for their drivers:

Incident on 20:27 Lumo train 28th December

Tonight the 20:27 Lumo service to Edinburgh made an unscheduled stop at Grantham to eject a rowdy passenger. A young man had to be removed due to trying to wrestle everyone in the carriage. The Customer Hosts told him to stop although he ignored them and said they couldn’t do anything. The...

www.railforums.co.uk

Customer Driver has to be the most ridiculous job title i have ever heard! I thought that C2C was bad using the name "Train Captain" for their Guards but Customer Driver is taking job titles to a new level of stupidity! I have no idea who thought that Customer Driver was a sensible job title! I can guarantee you that no passenger will ever refer to them as that!

What other ridiculous or poorly named job titles exist on our railway?

In my opinion these are the worst four job titles used:

• Customer Driver
• Senior Conductor
• Train Captain
• Train Manager

Train Manager is used by so many TOCs but sounds ridiculous. It sounds like someone who should be sitting in the TOC head office behind a computer running and managing the train company. When you think of a Train Manager it does not sound like someone who works onboard a train.

Senior Conductor is ridiculous because they get called Senior Conductor even when they are brand new to the railway and have just started the job. Senior Conductor sounds like someone who has been a Conductor for many years and then moved up to a higher rank. Just call them a Conductor instead. Or even better just scrap the term Conductor and call them a Guard like in the old days.

I would be interested to hear your opinions and views on other ridiculous job titles used on the railway?

The Train Manager is used in my corner of the railway world, I am a conductor, I work local services the Train Managers work long distance services and also "manage" customers hosts/OBS staff while on the train. Although I refer to myself as the guard, even when working the odd IET on the last leg.of thier journeys.

 

[PupCuff]

In terms of traincrew job titles, I would actually say I tend to prefer "Train Manager", it's a well understood term internationally and reflects the fact the role isn't just about doing the doors and checking tickets, it's about managing the on-train customer experience. Now a lot of longer distance operators have restructured their (catering) service managers out and added their responsibility to the TM role it arguably reinforces that job title further. I'm not a huge fan of 'Senior Conductor' or 'Guard', they come across as very antiquated IMO.


I wouldn't go as far as to describe any job titles as ridiculous, but some do raise an eyebrow or two in terms of the relationship between what the role actually does and what it's called.

Lumo's Ambassadors certainly have to be in for a shout for having a... unique job title. But it's difficult to argue that that doesn't add to their brand, of being a 'challenger' to the norm etc.

GBRf have Operational Safety Managers and Train Managers - neither actually manage operational safety or undertake duties you would expect of a 'train manager' - both are in fact train drivers.

I once came across a job advert for Chiltern for a "Continuous Improvement Specialist (Handyman)", who was the individual responsible for doing odd jobs, general maintenance, support etc around a train depot.

And Merseyrail advertise every so often for a "Fleet Performance Clerk", who is, as you would of course guess from the job title, the person who pages out disruption information and responds to customer enquiries on Facebook, Twitter, and other social media. Later on in the advert, it does explain that part of the role also involves recording fleet issues as they arise, which one assumes is where the job title comes from.

 

[The North Briton]

LNER have both ‘Duty Customer Experience Managers’ and ‘Customer Experience Duty Managers’!
The former are based in Control (sorry, the Service Delivery Team) and the latter outstationed across the route.

 

[irish_rail]

Another vote for Customer driver from me. Cringey beyond belief!

 

[43096]

“Train Presentation Team” Does that involve use if PowerPoint?

 

[tonyianmoore@g]

I once took a train from Henley to Twyford and the Guard/Conductor had a name plate that said he was a "Revenue Protection Officer"

 

[whoosh]

When I was at East Midlands Trains, one of the Managers had a title along the lines of 'Operations Strategy and Implementation Manager' - such a long title it had to be placed on his name badge in a smaller than usual font!

 

[FGW_DID]

I once took a train from Henley to Twyford and the Guard/Conductor had a name plate that said he was a "Revenue Protection Officer"

Thats because he would have been a “Revenue Protection Officer” from Revenue Protection and not a Guard. Henley Branch doesn’t have Guards, those services are DOO.

 

[TT-ONR-NRN]

On Board Supervisor

 

[RPM]

You've got to go a long way to beat Customer Driver, but ones I have come across include Area Station Managers being renamed Customer Service Managers, Booking Office Clerks being renamed Station Hosts and RPIs renamed Customer Service Inspectors. Also London Underground have Train Operators rather than Drivers for some reason.

 

[Mat17]

Customer Driver sounds like one of the passengers has let themselves into the driving cab and took the train for a spin. The Customer is the Driver after all.

 

[RPM]

Customer Driver sounds like one of the passengers has let themselves into the driving cab and took the train for a spin. The Customer is the Driver after all.

It reminds me of the early post-privatisation suggestion from one of the TOCs (I forget which) for Commuter Guards. IIRC the proposal was to get certain passengers to act as guards or RPIs in return for free or reduced price travel.

 

[43066]

Customer Service Inspectors

That’s probably the most ridiculous one I’ve heard.

Generally, if you can’t immediately tell from someone’s job title what their role is, that’s suggestive of a poor use of language.

Train Operators rather than Drivers

I suppose that’s because the ATO LU trains generally drive themselves, with the driver doing the doors.

 

[tonyianmoore@g]

Thats because he would have been a “Revenue Protection Officer” from Revenue Protection and not a Guard. Henley Branch doesn’t have Guards, those services are DOO.

Ah fair enough. Thought it was FGW giving new names to old jobs

 

[Horizon22]

There’s a lot of roles with “Manager” that don’t actually do any management. There might be management of a process, but I don’t think originally it was intended that way!

Related to this but “Operations” is probably the most overused word in railway job titles but actually offers very little insight into what a role does!

Senior Conductor is ridiculous because they get called Senior Conductor even when they are brand new to the railway and have just started the job. Senior Conductor sounds like someone who has been a Conductor for many years and then moved up to a higher rank. Just call them a Conductor instead. Or even better just scrap the term Conductor and call them a Guard like in the old days.

I would be interested to hear your opinions and views on other ridiculous job titles used on the railway?

As far as I’m aware on ex London Midland and ex-Central Trains there used to be a split between Conductor / Senior Conductor. Revenue related I think.

However when the roles were merged obviously Senior Conductors didn’t want a “name downgrade” and thus it’s been that way ever since.

 

[BJames]

That’s probably the most ridiculous one I’ve heard.

Generally, if you can’t immediately tell from someone’s job title what their role is, that’s suggestive of a poor use of language.



I suppose that’s because the ATO LU trains generally drive themselves, with the driver doing the doors.

Agreed, before reading this thread I'd never heard of that before and I wouldn't have a clue what a Customer Service Inspector was supposed to be doing (it's also not an accurate description of their role in the slightest). Wonder what TOC that was from.

 

[LowLevel]

There’s a lot of roles with “Manager” that don’t actually do any management. There might be management of a process, but I don’t think originally it was intended that way!

Related to this but “Operations” is probably the most overused word in railway job titles but actually offers very little insight into what a role does!



As far as I’m aware on ex London Midland and ex-Central Trains there used to be a split between Conductor / Senior Conductor. Revenue related I think.

However when the roles were merged obviously Senior Conductors didn’t want a “name downgrade” and thus it’s been that way ever since.

Conductor and Senior Conductor was a BR divide intended as part of the traincrew concept to enhance service provision on Intercity services, Senior Conductors got paid more and worked mostly for Intercity. With a few exceptions Conductors were Regional Railways and NSE.

It was Central Trains/Silverlink (National Express) in the mid 90s and it involved them doing a pay deal to restructure their Conductors on to the Senior Conductor (formerly mostly Intercity with a few exceptions) rate of pay. Nowadays Cross Country, WMR, EMR and TfW (in the ex Cambrian links inherited from Central Trains over 20 years ago) still use Senior Conductor.

It has just persisted over time. The exception is Greater Anglia which never renamed their Conductors and Senior Conductor grades and still has both.

Personally my name badge says Senior Conductor on it but I don't think I've ever used it except on paperwork. Internally within the company we are generally referred to as guards. Odd the Train Managers who also work here (seen more as a sideways move nowadays unlike elsewhere) are generally referred to as Train Managers despite also being guards.

In modern times Train Manager is usually used most by the travelling public. They call everyone a guard from the cleaners to the platform staff. It probably makes most sense.

Customer Driver is definitely my most cringeworthy title though. I thought the advert was a joke when it came out.

 

[TT-ONR-NRN]

All of these I agree are very cringey, with the exception of Train Manager which I personally like for long distance trains.

 

[fgwrich]

“Train Presentation Team” Does that involve use if PowerPoint?

Ah, now do they work out of the, ahem, Centre of Traincare Excellence as South West Trains once briefly labelled the... depots!

 

[WAB]

Also London Underground have Train Operators rather than Drivers for some reason.

I seem to recall it was to do with the conversion to one-person operation - traincrew went from a motorman and guard to just a train operator.

 

[whoosh]

It reminds me of the early post-privatisation suggestion from one of the TOCs (I forget which) for Commuter Guards. IIRC the proposal was to get certain passengers to act as guards or RPIs in return for free or reduced price travel.

C2C, or maybe their predecessor LTS Rail - it was very early in privatisation. They basically wanted the rush hour extras worked as a split shift and, "Let's think out the box okay guys? How about we get the passengers to do it?!"

 

[Amal]

That’s probably the most ridiculous one I’ve heard.

Generally, if you can’t immediately tell from someone’s job title what their role is, that’s suggestive of a poor use of language.



I suppose that’s because the ATO LU trains generally drive themselves, with the driver doing the doors.

So door operator

 

[Parallel]

I think CrossCountry's "Retail Service Manager" title gives the impression it's someone office based managing resources/ordering catering supplies etc, rather than on-train catering staff. I think GWR refer to the same position as 'Customer Host'... you decide if that's more or less appropriate!

 

[Horizon22]

Ah, now do they work out of the, ahem, Centre of Traincare Excellence as South West Trains once briefly labelled the... depots!

Train Presentation is a pretty standard team for cleaning and preparation - the train is “presented for service” from the depot. Preparation might be better but then there’s potential confusion with the more formal unit prep.

I think CrossCountry's "Retail Service Manager" title gives the impression it's someone office based managing resources/ordering catering supplies etc, rather than on-train catering staff. I think GWR refer to the same position as 'Customer Host'... you decide if that's more or less appropriate!

I think this where Train Manager becomes useful - one person in charge of potentially multiple staff on-board and the safety of the train (alongside the driver).

I think Customer Host is a sensible term as opposed to the XC title which as you say gives a different impression.

 

[busestrains]

Does anyone know the story of how and why C2C choose the job title "Train Captain" for their Guards? When exactly did they start using this job title?

Up until 2019 (when they finally went DOO) all twelve coach C2C trains required Guards (i believe only sixteen Guards were employed) but they used the job title "Train Captain" instead. I think "Train Captain" is an even more ridiculous name than "Train Manager" in my view. It reminds me of Singapore where they use the ridiculous job title "Bus Captain" for their bus drivers.

I am curious when the term "Train Captain" started being used? I am presuming it was when C2C first introduced 357s (and therefore introduced DOO too on all trains except the twelve coach ones) as i do not remember it before then or in British Rail days?

Another ridiculous job title to add to the list is "Passenger Host" which is what GTR call their RPIs that work on the Great Northern and Thameslink services. They changed their job title to "Passenger Host" a couple of years ago. It is such a ridiculous job title as "Passenger Host" does not describe the job of RPIs accurately at all. You only see them very rarely and all they do is board trains randomly and check tickets and dish out penalty fares and prosecutions. The term "Passenger Host" is a ridiculous inaccurate job title for this role.

 

[dk1]

Back in the 1980s I remember a member of railway staff coming into the pub where I lived. My auntie asked who she was. I told her she was the LWRA Ladies Waiting Room Attendant to which she replied “oh, the female sh*t house cleaner” lol.

 

[Urban Gateline]

You've got to go a long way to beat Customer Driver, but ones I have come across include Area Station Managers being renamed Customer Service Managers, Booking Office Clerks being renamed Station Hosts and RPIs renamed Customer Service Inspectors. Also London Underground have Train Operators rather than Drivers for some reason.

Thameslink has "Passenger Hosts" who are basically RPI's, Station Hosts are multi-skilled at GTR and can do Gateline and Ticket Office (but not Platforms!)

 

[Trackman]

• Train Captain

Always cracks me up.
They have been demoted (well not really) now to PSA's.

 

[ExRes]

I once took a train from Henley to Twyford and the Guard/Conductor had a name plate that said he was a "Revenue Protection Officer"

Revenue Protection Officer was a BR grade alive and kicking when I joined NSE in 1992