Who would you like to make train passenger announcements?

[godfreycomplex]

Which celebrity would you like to voice on-train passenger announcements?

One's who spring to mind are Sean Dyche and Fenella Fielding, Marilyn Monroe (although I think they are both dead)

Fenella Fielding very much still with us
Sébastien Chabal (with a fairly impenetrable accent in both English and French) would do me nicely, as would Alan Bennett
“We do seem to have come up against a signal in a pleasing shade of sunset crimson. If anyone is slightly annoyed by this, take a look out the window and watch the sparrows gently soaring over the hedgerows, but don’t get into an argument with your neighbour, you might spill your tea”

 

[R Trevithick]

The one and only voice

Mr James Earl Jones

 

[nlogax]

The one and only voice

Mr James Earl Jones

As Darth Vader or himself..?

 

[R Trevithick]

As Darth Vader or himself..?

Definitely himself

 

[DarloRich]

Me. But after I brought my own special style to the announcements I would be sacked. Thereafter Rab C Nesbit, The Reverend Dr Ian Paisley, Brian Blessed and Tom Jones

 

[43096]

Rowan Atkinson.

He managed to make people laugh at the words “petrol pump” on Top Gear. Anyone who can do that must be able to do the same on a train PA system.

 

[Mollman]

I was on a VTWC train where Peter Key was doing the announcements, not sure if it was a planned PR event or he just asked to have a go - made people chuckle anyway.

 

[backontrack]

Marcus Brigstocke?

The one and only voice

Mr James Earl Jones

Good call.

 

[stut]

I was on a VTWC train where Peter Key was doing the announcements, not sure if it was a planned PR event or he just asked to have a go - made people chuckle anyway.

Was this the train to Aberystwyth? *

* Yes, I know they don't, but maybe an extension of the Shrewsbury service could...

 

[mde]

Mick Cash.

"The 11:03 South Western Railway service to London Waterloo will depart from platform 3. This is due to the tireless efforts of loyal, hard-working staff in the face of continual savage assaults on the workforce by the fatcat bosses of foreign-owned companies and their ideologically-driven paymasters in the Department for Transport. Please mind the gap between the train and the platform edge."

Add Manuel Cortes and Mick Whelan on others for full effect.

 

[mde]

Clearly the only real answer is David Attenborough!

An excellent choice for parliamentary services… "And here, we see Teeside Airport. Won't be seeing it again until next week though as this train only stops here once".

 

[fusionblue]

The automated lady who is already on the DLR. Allherwordswilljustmergetogetherwithnopronounciation and it will be much cheaper than an actual person. Usability doesn't matter.

 

[mde]

The automated lady who is already on the DLR. Allherwordswilljustmergetogetherwithnopronounciation and it will be much cheaper than an actual person. Usability doesn't matter.

If that's the case, why not use the 'brilliant' Acapela voice some TOCs are using in stations? It produces some comedy results!

 

[dorsetdesiro]

The posh female announcer, we get on SWR, makes me smile when she pronounces places like "Pertsmuth" for Portsmouth! She's probably too grand for down here which she wouldn't be out of place somewhere like GWR's Cotswold line!

 

[backontrack]

...as would Alan Bennett
“We do seem to have come up against a signal in a pleasing shade of sunset crimson. If anyone is slightly annoyed by this, take a look out the window and watch the sparrows gently soaring over the hedgerows, but don’t get into an argument with your neighbour, you might spill your tea”

Fantastic!

 

[Del1977]

Joanna Lumley, or someone else with received pronunciation.

 

[berwicksfinest]

ozzy osbourne

 

[Harlequin]

Tim Westwood

 

[tiptoptaff]

Eddie Butler

 

[159]

Benedict Cumberbatch
Neil deGrasse Tyson
Donald Trump

 

[tiptoptaff]

Donald Trump

"We're arriving at a station. We have all the best stations. We have the biggest stations. I'm going to build more stations, they'll be the best stations ever. And We'll make the buses pay for it. They will, I tell you, they will pay"

 

[dorsetdesiro]

"We're arriving at a station. We have all the best stations. We have the biggest stations. I'm going to build more stations, they'll be the best stations ever. And We'll make the buses pay for it. They will, I tell you, they will pay"

The new stations gonna be yuge, it'll be great. Bigly. This is not FAKE NEWS!

 

[J-2739]

Imagine Morgan Freeman?

 

[mde]

"We're arriving at a station. We have all the best stations. We have the biggest stations. I'm going to build more stations, they'll be the best stations ever. And We'll make the buses pay for it. They will, I tell you, they will pay"

Don't… then people might think the Pacer is being reborn A wright streetlite on a freight wagon…

 

[hooverboy]

Rowan Atkinson.

He managed to make people laugh at the words “petrol pump” on Top Gear. Anyone who can do that must be able to do the same on a train PA system.

+1 for rowan,especially if he does it in the "school headmaster register roll-call" role..plenty of titters for "chipping sodbury" methinks!
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct...=FiWJWLCoH2M&usg=AOvVaw2SJMfzE7ynEjBEgoDczx-z

 

[JBuchananGB]

Victor Meldrew. I don’t believe it!

 

[OhNoAPacer]

Victor Meldrew. I don’t believe it!

Surely Victor Meldrew would be only be used when someone has been caught traveling without a ticket and comes out with one of the 'a big boy did it and ran away whilst the dog was eating my homework' excuses.

 

[kevconnor]

I would have to go for Alan Bennett. Something about the soft Yorkshire tone would suit it well.

 

[kevconnor]

Alternatively would go for the characters Michelle and Officer Crabtree from Allo Allo
"Listen very carefully to the following announcement we shall say it only once...The 8:34 from Brostol is up the crick Without a piddle."

 

[TrainzBK]

David Attenborough