DaveHarries
Established Member
Evening all,
This came my way on Facebook on Tuesday evening and I decided I would share it. Here goes:
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Well it certainly made me chuckle.
Dave
This came my way on Facebook on Tuesday evening and I decided I would share it. Here goes:
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- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS ABOUT TO CHANGE.
ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.
In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted un ze forst plas."
Well it certainly made me chuckle.
Dave
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