You're 'avin a laugh!

[37401]

mines recent, i was bashing the XC (was suposed to be NXEC) HST (the 0800 From Pic) Between Wolverhampton and New Street, as i flailed past Smethwick Galton Bridge some woman (very nice looking one too) flailed back, The Proper way too! possible female gricer

 

[43034 The Black Horse]

mines recent, i was bashing the XC (was suposed to be NXEC) HST (the 0800 From Pic) Between Wolverhampton and New Street, as i flailed past Smethwick Galton Bridge some woman (very nice looking one too) flailed back, The Proper way too! possible female gricer

OOI, What was there to flail at?


On the platform at Newport and woman points to a train and says Swansea? To which I reply No, this is Newport.


She never did get on that HST

(I'm sure the above is a common occurrence)

 

[EM2]

Another one we like at St Pancras is either:
'Eurostar?'
'Thanks! You're very kind!'

Or after I've given them directions to somewhere:
'You're a star!'
'No, for Eurostar, go straight on and turn left at M&S'

 

[Mintona]

"How long is the train?"
"3 carriages"

"Does this train go to Manchester?"
"If it doesn't, someone's made a big mistake."

 

[mrcheek]

I read this one in a book, but its so good I had to share it.

Overheard at Dent station on the Settle and Carlisle. (The station being a couple of miles from the village)

Traveller: Why did they build the station so far away from the village?
Local: Because they wanted it to be near the railway line....

 

[Aussie_Rail]

One of my favorites was when me and a mate were riding on a local tourist railway and the train travels quite slow, and we were passing a built up area and there was this middle aged man mowing the lawn in front of his fence (the land between the railway track and his property) and as the train went by my mate yelled out "you missed a bit" and my God this man went red with rage!

One of the funniest moments I've had in a while.

 

[37401]

OOI, What was there to flail at

Her

 

[Geezertronic]

Another one we like at St Pancras is either:
'Eurostar?'
'Thanks! You're very kind!'

That's a Tim Vine joke

 

[SouthEastern-465]

best one for me,on the bromley north line,drunk woman having a nice big sh!t on the line,caused big big disruption,must of had a good curry or two!

 

[generalvegitable]

another funny one I did recently was on the north norfolk railway, we had stopped by a golf course and a guy was just about to take a swing, so I shouted "four!" at him (as ya do) his face was a picture afterwards

 

[Skarpur]

Best I've seen was on a Midland Mainline service to Sheffield that got held outside of Kettering due to a trespasser on the line (he actually walked right down the side of the train with BTP following at a distance). Anyway, there had been two announcements by the train manager explaining why the train had stopped and apologising for the delay when someone comes belting down the train screaming "let me off, let me off, its a short platform!" obviously thinking that were were in Kettering station (I've no idea if Kettering has short platforms or not). Brought a smile to my face as looking out of the window either side all I could see were fields and we were obviously still dome distance away from Kettering station.

 

[generalvegitable]

kettering has long platforms (I would say 8 or 9 car)

 

[O L Leigh]

another funny one I did recently was on the north norfolk railway, we had stopped by a golf course and a guy was just about to take a swing, so I shouted "four!" at him (as ya do) his face was a picture afterwards

In a similar vein...

We pass a golf course with a tee right up by the boundary fence. One of my colleagues was on his way up to London and spotted a golfist on his back-swing, so he gave him both barrels on the horn. Because he was coming from behind the golfist had no idea he was approaching, so he scared the fertilizer out of this poor chap and caused him to slice his shot badly. When he looked back the golfist was hopping mad and waving his golf cue in impotent rage.

O L Leigh

 

[FusionRail]

I would say Platforms 3/4 at kettering are 9 car + a bit more as 9 car meridians fit in, as do HSTs. Platforms 1/2 are slightly shorter.