satisnek
Member
https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/southronWho is Southron?
It was, after all, between Basingstoke and Reading
https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/southronWho is Southron?
Quite a few times on this thread, people seem to have posted their disdain about the idea of 'getting offended on other people's behalf'.Welcome to 2018, where getting offended on other people's behalf is the done thing.
When did this become a thing? I thought it was called 'empathy', and was once considered a positive trait... Has the Daily Mail been running a campaign against it?
So if, for example, a slightly drunk man boards a train, and starts addressing comments to the two women opposite him along the lines of 'You're a fit bird aren't you? I would! Not so keen on your friend there though, she's a bit of a minger, haha!", are the only people allowed to get offended the two women in question? Everyone else should just mind their own business, because he is, after all, just having a bit of a laugh?
I wonder if something that is subjective can be sexist.
Some people who spend thousands of pounds to look "sexy", I find rather horiffic to look at.
The key difference is that empathy is about feeling (and getting involved in, potentially, as you say) the feelings that others are feeling, and that, assuming they want you involved, is definitely positive. The modern-day version seems to be a bit different, in that it seems to be about people deciding that someone who is the butt of a joke *should* be offended (or even more commonly, some theoretical person who may not even exist who is the butt of a joke) and taking action on that basis.
The former is commendable, the latter is rather silly. An example might be a situation where a woman on a train was being chatted up by a bloke who she actually did fancy and she was more than happy for this to be going on, and someone intervening to tell him to leave her alone *then*.
Or even slightly more controversially, a group of people of different races are sitting around a table on said train and are making racist jokes about one another to one another, clearly as a group of mates[1]. If someone else was *actually offended* by them they should ask them to stop and it would be right for someone else to get involved too if they didn't feel comfortable to do so, but not if they were not actually bothering anyone.
[1] British "lad culture" tends towards the idea that the better friends you are with someone, the more offensive you can be to them.
...and that same 'lad culture' has often found it acceptable to intimidate, bully and sometimes physically harm people they see as 'other' or easy targets for a 'bit of fun' cos it's 'only a joke'.
Indeed. But we shouldn't damn an entire culture, only specific bad actions.
If I am not offended by something someone is saying/doing to me, I do not want you involved, it is none of your business. Someone getting involved in something that is none of their business does offend me.
Of course, if something offends you say so and it is only right for it to stop. But don't go around taking offence on others' behalves; they don't need it and don't want it.
Even if a remark or message is not directly aimed at a person, it is quite acceptable for that person to want to change a culture that feels that it is acceptable to make those sort of remarks or messages.
While I agree that police involvement is not needed, you're way off the mark about people getting help.
Thing is, the 'bit of a laugh' you're having is at someone else's expense. Banter in mess rooms that goes too far and 'is just a bit of a laugh' to you and your mates can be bullying and also hurtful to the person it is aimed at.
No police required, culprit doesn't need to be fired, but they do need someone to have a quiet chat and point out it is wrong and if it is repeated then some action will be taken.
No police required