Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

[Bevan Price]

Ooh no, too many sprouts give me toxic gas!

You are damaging the atmosphere - methane is far worse than CO2.
Personally I find it hard to understand why anybody likes sprouts; along with other overboiled vegetables (cabbage, cauliflower), I thing their taste is repulsive.

 

[D821]

I only enjoy cauliflower if it is smothered in cheese sauce.

 

[Meerkat]

You are damaging the atmosphere - methane is far worse than CO2.
Personally I find it hard to understand why anybody likes sprouts; along with other overboiled vegetables (cabbage, cauliflower), I thing their taste is repulsive.

Sprouts are delicious!

 

[yorksrob]

Sprouts definitely need banning!

"Nooooooo .........."

 

[SteveM70]

I only enjoy cauliflower if it is smothered in cheese sauce.

Sacrilege!! Cheese sauce is from the devil’s own menu. Vile stuff

 

[Wilts Wanderer]

Use of the term ‘authoritarian’ when not used in a context discussing fascist, communist, religious or otherwise similarly oppressive regimes.

 

[D821]

People who think all plural words should have apostrophes.

Or:
People who think all plural word's should have apostrophe's, if you didn't get what I meant the first time.

 

[MattRat]

Use of the term ‘authoritarian’ when not used in a context discussing fascist, communist, religious or otherwise similarly oppressive regimes.

I think it's underused is some regards. You can't defend your freedoms when you won't even point out authoritarian behaviour.

 

[Bald Rick]

Sacrilege!! Cheese sauce is from the devil’s own menu. Vile stuff

agreed. Therefore:

any vegetables covered in cheese.

 

[birchesgreen]

agreed. Therefore:

any vegetables covered in cheese.

Even cheesy chips?

 

[Meerkat]

I think it's underused is some regards. You can't defend your freedoms when you won't even point out authoritarian behaviour.

Its overused - the boy who cried wolf comes to mind.

And count me in on the ban against melting cheese over anything other than Italian food (excluding plain pasta, which is like regurgitation in reverse when covered in cheese)

 

[Gloster]

People who stand chatting on the ‘phone at the bus stop and don’t even start a long drawn-out goodbye until the bus has opened its door. They then put the ‘phone away, get on the bus and start rummaging around trying to find the same ‘phone again. Then they go through the complicated process of working out how to switch it back on again, after which they scroll through an interminable series of options to find their bus pass.

 

[Bald Rick]

Even cheesy chips?

top of the list.

 

[Busaholic]

top of the list.

An abomination. Chips should be served with mayonaisse.

 

[D821]

Oven chips.
An oasis-like illusion of a chip that always underwhelms.

 

[ABB125]

Even cheesy chips?

I can't recall ever having cheesy chips, but I suspect I'd quite like them.

And count me in on the ban against melting cheese over anything other than Italian food (excluding plain pasta, which is like regurgitation in reverse when covered in cheese)

Cheesy pasta is great! Though it has to be plain grated cheese, rather than cheese sauce...

Oven chips.
An oasis-like illusion of a chip that always underwhelms.

I prefer over chips to "proper" chips (whatever they are). On one of the very rare occasions when I purchase food from McDonald's, and even more rarely get chips as well as a burger (plain, by the way, and an absolute bargain at 89p!), the chips were actually disgusting: coated in salt and slathered in grease.
I accept that some (very odd!) people like that though...

 

[MattRat]

People who think all plural words should have apostrophes.

Or:
People who think all plural word's should have apostrophe's, if you didn't get what I meant the first time.

Alternatively, people who never use apostrophes.

 

[Strat-tastic]

Top tips for sprouts:
When boiling, bring to boil then change the water to finish the cooking. It removes a lot of the bitterness.
Alternatively, shred sprouts and fry in butter with bacon, garlic, and chestnuts. Yum!

 

[yorksrob]

Top tips for sprouts:
When boiling, bring to boil then change the water to finish the cooking. It removes a lot of the bitterness.
Alternatively, shred sprouts and fry in butter with bacon, garlic, and chestnuts. Yum!

I tend to just saturate them with gravy, mint sauce and horseradish sauce.

 

[32475]

TV advertisements which you watch and haven’t the foggiest what product is actually being advertised. This includes those featuring people who you suspect maybe celebrities of some sort but once again you haven’t the foggiest. It’s probably an age thing!
Also car adverts where roads are completely devoid of any traffic whatsoever.

 

[52290]

TV advertisements which you watch and haven’t the foggiest what product is actually being advertised. This includes those featuring people who you suspect maybe celebrities of some sort but once again you haven’t the foggiest. It’s probably an age thing!
Also car adverts where roads are completely devoid of any traffic whatsoever.

I still don't know what the Meerkats were / are advertising.

 

[Strat-tastic]

The ridiculous wait before they announce the winner on TV. Just get on with it for Pete's sake

 

[yorksrob]

I still don't know what the Meerkats were / are advertising.

The Oleg toy I think.

 

[MattRat]

Also car adverts where roads are completely devoid of any traffic whatsoever.

Also car adverts that advertise a big, slow, ugly, and generally uncomfortable crossover/SUV as some sort of 'experience'.

 

[yorksrob]

How about car adverts generally ! (Actually no, they're preferable to the online gambling and erectile dysfunction ones !).

 

[Busaholic]

The ridiculous wait before they announce the winner on TV. Just get on with it for Pete's sake

On British TV Loyd Grossman was the instigator of that on the original Masterchef afaik, but it's now got that you can go and bleed your radiator, or whatever else turns you on, in the prolonged wait. An honourable mention for 'Who wants to be a millionaire' too, but it could be justified to an extent there if a lot of money was at stake and to keep the viewer on tenterhooks.

 

[Ediswan]

On British TV Loyd Grossman was the instigator of that on the original Masterchef afaik, but it's now got that you can go and bleed your radiator, or whatever else turns you on, in the prolonged wait. An honourable mention for 'Who wants to be a millionaire' too, but it could be justified to an extent there if a lot of money was at stake and to keep the viewer on tenterhooks.

"Who wants to be a millionaire" pre-dates "Masterchef" by about two years. The practice has just got worse and worse.

 

[yorksrob]

On British TV Loyd Grossman was the instigator of that on the original Masterchef afaik, but it's now got that you can go and bleed your radiator, or whatever else turns you on, in the prolonged wait. An honourable mention for 'Who wants to be a millionaire' too, but it could be justified to an extent there if a lot of money was at stake and to keep the viewer on tenterhooks.

"We've deliberated, cogitated and regurgitated....." Or something like that.

 

[MattRat]

How about car adverts generally ! (Actually no, they're preferable to the online gambling and erectile dysfunction ones !).

I don't mind them for cars I like, like the Lexus LC500.

But I agree gambling in general should be banned.

 

[yorksrob]

I don't mind them for cars I like, like the Lexus LC500.

But I agree gambling in general should be banned.

Well, i don't believe in banking the activity (one man's poison etc) but they certainly shouldn't be shoving it down our throats every five minutes. Whatever happened to proper adverts like the shake'n'vac etc.