From my perspective, as a Remoaner, if we held another referendum and it still went in favour of leaving then fair enough, let's just do it! If after more than three years of this shower of the proverbial a majority of people have looked at it and gone "Yes! I want more of this!" then stuff it let's just give it to them. Leave with no-deal and just get it over with. And I would think (and as there's plenty of us on the thread I may be proved wrong) that that broad sentiment goes for quite a few on the Remain side. A second referendum where Leave win again? Well that's the end of the Remain argument as a viable political force in the near if a majority of voters still want more of this.
I don't agree with your last sentence.
This doesn't end on 1st November, with or without a deal. Taking the long term view, what's the best way to prove the value of EU membership? Answer - take it away in the most dramatic, unplanned, unpragmatic, ideologically-driven and damaging way possible.
The leave side seem to have given up all rationality and be driven entirely by fervour and paranoia. They make the fatal mistake of believing their own myths. (or making up new ones - such as Johnson's kippers. why did he do this? is he laughing at this own supporters?)
To make brexit work (not just happen), it needs to be done slowly, carefully, with a managed transition from one situation to another and with as much consensus in the country as possible. That way the disruption and hardship as, for example, trading arrangements and citizens' rights change can be managed and minimised (even if not totally prevented). A no deal brexit is the exact opposite of this.
The harder the brexit, the more damaging to the UK and to the leave cause. And the quicker the UK will return to the EU, one way or another. This is a marathon, not a sprint. The sad thing is how many people will have their lives badly disrupted along the way.