Abject Stupidity

[LexyBoy]

I was once carrying out an unannounced fire drill - went my chosen (secluded) call point, set it off, waited a bit, then made my way through the building to the alarm panel to reset it. Came across a member of staff at their desk (while the sounder was still going):

Me: What are you doing here?
Them: I didn't know we were having a fire drill?
Me: How do you know we're now having a fire?

It wasn't as if everyone at the surrounding desks, and the customers hadn't all left as well!!

Shouldn't the fire marshal responsible for the area have evicted them before the end of the drill?

At university we had an unannounced fire drill in our labs where the marshals decided to make it more realistic by letting a smoke bomb in one of the (fire escape) staircases. Email came round afterwards saying that whilst it was good that everyone was out in under 2 minutes, lots of people just walked through the thick smoke rather than using an alternative exit!

 

[Wyvern]

I work in a bank, and we will be open June 4th and 5th.

Arent the 4th and 5th public holidays not bank holidays?

 

[CC 72100]

Arent the 4th and 5th public holidays not bank holidays?

I believe they are classed as public holidays, as I remeber a feature about it on BBC breakfast I think. Could just be imagining it mind!

 

[Heinz57]

Amy Childs ladies and gentleman - you could write a book from the stuff she comes out with.

For example;

She was was quoted by saying that since having her breasts enhanced they have become saggy, they are heavy and give her back ache. Ok this is understandable, however she then said that because of this she has decided to have them enlarged even more.

How exactly will making them bigger and heavyer make them less heavy and stop giving you back ache?


This second example comes from when she was on the Christmas special of Celebrity Juice

Keith - So did you invent Vajazzleing then?
Amy - Yeah
Keith - Did you?
Amy - Yeah. Well no I didn't invent it but I heard about it

A little later

Amy - TOWIE is real, they just set things up
Keith - So its not real?
Amy - Stop confusing me. TOWIE is real, they just set things up
Rufus - Its real but they set things up? That is majestic! Its literaly like you don't know the meaning of words (so true Rufus!)

 

[hairyhandedfool]

Arent the 4th and 5th public holidays not bank holidays?

The 4th is the Spring Bank Holiday (usually the last Monday in May), the 5th is an additional Diamond Jubilee Bank Holiday.

Source: Direct.gov.uk

 

[trentside]

I was once talking to one of the barrier staff at Lincoln, and she claimed that someone had once asked her colleague where 'Terminates' was - this was in the days when trains were shown as From: Sheffield, To: Terminates

 

[Clip]

A friend of mine in August 2010, having visited Wales two days earlier:

Do I need a Passport to enter Scotland?

The same friend in September 2011:

Do I need a Passport to enter Wales?

I was once asked by a young chap in a Pad-Cardiff "Can you stamp my passport on-board? My mate says it'll save me time at Cardiff station" as he held his passport out to me...

I think Ive mentioned before on here how we used to tease the Yanks when working at the cross and they asked for the Edinboro(sic) train. And we used to ask if they had their passports and scottish currency with them.

Well it did used to get boring sometimes

 

[LE Greys]

I imagine I've quoted this one before, but here's a record of a conversation in Coach B of the Highland Chieftain after the announcement about quiet coaches was made.

Passenger - Can I use an arc welder?
Crank - What?
Passenger - Can I use an arc welder if it's in silent mode?
[Stunned silence]

I think Ive mentioned before on here how we used to tease the Yanks when working at the cross and they asked for the Edinboro(sic) train. And we used to ask if they had their passports and scottish currency with them.

Well it did used to get boring sometimes

Might still happen yet.

 

[Clip]

Might still happen yet.

Thats ok. I dont visit it often. 1tpe3y












1 trip per every 3 years

 

[Greenback]

Around 1991 or 1992, we were discussing the Channel Tunnel in work, when one of my colleagues asked what would happen if a submarine hit it.

I am please dto report he was promoted to management a year later.

 

[Ascot]

Stewardess: The local time here has just gone 5pm
Passengers next to me: S*** I forgot to change the clock upstairs before we left!

Council Tenant: I need to move out of this flat as I can't climb stairs and the lifts keep breaking down. It must be house as I cannot climb stairs...
Clerk: OK so you currently live in a ground floor flat. How would you get to your bedroom in a house?
Council Tenant: Oh... <phone goes down>.

Here's a few I've messed up on...

Over the previous 2 months before this event I was in the same hotel Monday-Friday and very sleep deprived...
Me:<trying to get keycard to open the door>
<clunking noise and door opens to present a slightly ticked off bloke>
Bloke:Yes?
Me:S*** sorry this was last weeks.
Bloke:Don't worry I did the same last month...

After that month I was at a friends house...
Girl:Do you want a drink? <leaning towards mini-fridge which looked very much like the glass ones>
Me:No we'll go the shop and get them as they charge too much here..
Girl:Errr... you're at my house now & I definitely don't charge...
That night I slept for 12 hours :roll:

 

[Flamingo]

Around 1991 or 1992, we were discussing the Channel Tunnel in work, when one of my colleagues asked what would happen if a submarine hit it.

I am please dto report he was promoted to management a year later.

Can do less harm there

 

[Schnellzug]

I think Ive mentioned before on here how we used to tease the Yanks when working at the cross and they asked for the Edinboro(sic) train. And we used to ask if they had their passports and scottish currency with them.

Give Alex Salmon the chance, and that may well be the case.

 

[wintonian]

Today's example of the observational skills of the Homo sapien:

I was coming up the escalator in a shopping centre in Southampton where immediately opposite at the top is another escalator and they are in pairs of up and down.

However the young lady in front of me complete with suitcase proceeded off the top of the escalator and on to the next one, however she managed to go up about 3 steps before realising she hadn't actually moved and after 2 or 3 seconds of looking around and trying not to go back to whence she came suddenly realised that I was now passing her on the correct escalator.

Cheered me up this morning anyway.

 

[TukayAway]

Arent the 4th and 5th public holidays not bank holidays?

Most High Street banks now open on 'Bank' holidays. Admittedly the smaller branches won't and there is sometimes a reduced service and or shortened hours. But I've been working bank/public holidays for at least the last three years.

 

[wintonian]

Most High Street banks now open on 'Bank' holidays. Admittedly the smaller branches won't and there is sometimes a reduced service and or shortened hours. But I've been working bank/public holidays for at least the last three years.

There not here and I live in a city! However a couple are open past lunchtime on Saturdays. The nearest place I can think of for a bank holiday service is London but then I don't keep tabs on every banks opening hours so there might be a couple somewhere.

 

[IanXC]

Most High Street banks now open on 'Bank' holidays. Admittedly the smaller branches won't and there is sometimes a reduced service and or shortened hours. But I've been working bank/public holidays for at least the last three years.

My experience is that its far from most! Branches in shopping centres will be open as its usually a condition of the lease but other than that its pretty rare.

 

[heart-of-wessex]

I've pointed out something stupid before, some years ago watching 'Trains in Action' (or something like that) on VHS with my mate. It was focussed on the ECML in the 90's, so you can picture the traction.

Anyway this 91 was leaving Donny and my mate asked 'what's the flap that's open?' The said flap was on the side and was like one you'd see on a car so I said 'oh that's the fuel flap then'

My mate gave a blank look and then carried on watching saying nothing, and there's me wondering why he had a puzzled face....

...Until it clicked some minutes later...Fuel cap on a Class 91?

 

[102 fan]

Perhaps, but you could see a bit of sand and I am not convinced this guy was that familiar with tides...



I've heard the exact same question...

I let it go because you may need to present a passport or ID document to your travel provider when travelling between Northern Ireland and the rest of the UK.

Only because the airlines require it. ID is required for all internal GB flights.

 

[Schnellzug]

I've pointed out something stupid before, some years ago watching 'Trains in Action' (or something like that) on VHS with my mate. It was focussed on the ECML in the 90's, so you can picture the traction.

Anyway this 91 was leaving Donny and my mate asked 'what's the flap that's open?' The said flap was on the side and was like one you'd see on a car so I said 'oh that's the fuel flap then'

My mate gave a blank look and then carried on watching saying nothing, and there's me wondering why he had a puzzled face....

...Until it clicked some minutes later...Fuel cap on a Class 91?

Sander filler, I suppose they are, aren't they? Not really any more daft, though, than stopping a Diesel loco by a water column and sticking the bag in, like they did originally to fill up the train heating boiler

 

[The 375 King]

Abject Stupidity - the teenage girl on my train to London who set off the fire alarm by having a fag in the toilet and making me late for an important job interveiw.

 

[Ascot]

Abject Stupidity - the teenage girl on my train to London who set off the fire alarm by having a fag in the toilet and making me late for an important job interveiw.

Wow, how long was the delay?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[90019]

Today, I've had two people manage to walk straight into the n/s mirror when getting off my bus.

It's slightly annoying as it normally means readjusting the mirror but, at the same time, it is quite funny.

 

[The 375 King]

Wow, how long was the delay?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Not more than ten minits but I then missed a conection at LDB for Croydon so was half hour late for a job interveiw because of a selfish little chav.

 

[VTPreston_Tez]

Little kids that don't realise that the big kids are at least thrice as hard as them and twice the size. Maybe it's abject stupidity, maybe not...
As well as my top set school bunch not being able to answer the easiest of questions but aceing tests :/

 

[Ascot]

Not more than ten minits but I then missed a conection at LDB for Croydon so was half hour late for a job interveiw because of a selfish little chav.

You timed that tight for an interview.

 

[Minilad]

Apparently many of the younger generation were unaware that Titanic was a real ship that really sank and not just a hollywood film

 

[flymo]

Apparently many of the younger generation were unaware that Titanic was a real ship that really sank and not just a hollywood film

A few posts on failbook can testify to this

 

[starrymarkb]

Working on the information line in the internet age means the average customer intelligence has plummeted.

"How do I cross the road if there are tram lines in it?"
"I don't know what this town is called" - You live there!

Plus the lady with an iPad who held up the bag drop at Bristol airport because she hadn't printed a boarding pass and thought the iPad would be a substitute and would not go to the check in line!

 

[LE Greys]

Apparently many of the younger generation were unaware that Titanic was a real ship that really sank and not just a hollywood film

Conversely, a lot of people seem convinced that [insert name of film here] was either 'real' or 'based on real events' as opposed to a complete work of fiction loosely based on something obscure that happened.

Plus the lady with an iPad who held up the bag drop at Bristol airport because she hadn't printed a boarding pass and thought the iPad would be a substitute and would not go to the check in line!

That'll probably be standard procedure in a few years' time, people will look at you as if to say "You still use paper!?"